


The Weight of These Wings

by BrokenWings0712



Series: Broken Wings [3]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angels, Angst, Car Sex, Eventual Smut, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Hurt/Comfort, Kissing, Nephilim, Oral Sex, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Panic Attacks, Past Rape/Non-con, Smut, Vaginal Fingering
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-16
Updated: 2018-03-08
Packaged: 2019-03-19 11:30:29
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 18
Words: 36,665
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13703568
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BrokenWings0712/pseuds/BrokenWings0712
Summary: Third part in the Broken Wings series.Alex stared up at him with wide eyes and reflected on the past week. So much had happened. She left her old life, met Death, was raped, fought her way out, grew closer to this man and almost lost him tonight after battling an angry spirit, but it was that desperation she'd felt as she cradled his bleeding head in her hands and the gratitude in the car that made her nod once. If she died tomorrow, Alex wanted to know that the man standing between her knees knew how she felt."I need to hear it, Al," Dean whispered, eyes dark and intense. "Tell me.""Yes," she breathed and closed her eyes as Dean leaned in.The kiss never came, however. When Alex opened her eyes, she was sitting on the ground in front of a small campfire, and a man was smiling at her from the other side."Alex," he said, releasing a sigh and shaking his head. "I've waited a long time to meet you. Snickers?"





	1. Chapter 1

Alex stared at the man in front of her with wide eyes. "I'm, I'm sorry?" 

The man rolled his eyes and tossed a candy bar in her direction. "Eat it," he ordered. "Maybe it'll make you a little more open to conversation, huh?"

Never taking her eyes off of the stranger, Alex slowly reached out and picked up the Snickers bar lying in the dirt and unwrapped it. It was her favorite, and she was starving, but still, two minutes ago she'd been in a motel bathroom locking lips with Dean Winchester. "This isn't poisoned, is it?" she asked.

The man waggled his eyebrows. "If it was, I wouldn't tell you that, now would I?" Alex shook her head and watched as the man took a bite of his own bar and continued to talk. "Besides, you and I," he pointed between them, "have a lot to discuss. It wouldn't do to kill you." 

"Who are you?" she asked, heart pounding in her chest. "Why did you bring me here?"

"One question at a time, sweetheart, and I'm asking first. Now, what do you know about your parents?"

Alex snorted and rolled her eyes. "What is this, therapy?" She shook her head and started to stand. "No, thanks, dude. I'll find my own way back." She turned and started walking into the darkness when the man, who was apparently only about her height, appeared in front of her.

"Nope," he shrugged as he placed a hand on each of her arms. "I'm not into the whole touchy-feely-spill-your-guts type thing. I heard Dad tried it once with my brother, but it didn't do any good. He's still a pain in the ass, and Dad still left."

Alex batted his arms away and walked around him with a huff. She didn't know where she was going--it was too dark to see anything more than a few feet in front of her--but she figured she'd hit civilization eventually. She only got a few paces away when she heard the crunch of dirt and rocks behind her as the man followed.

"It's a simple question, Alex," he called from behind her. Suddenly he was right next to her. "What do you know about your parents?"

"Jesus!" she squeaked. "The hell's the matter with you?" she spit, glaring at him. "Never met my dad, and my mom took off when I was a kid! There! You happy?"

The man in front of her actually had the decency to look hurt. "No," he murmured. "Why would that make me happy?" 

Alex spun on her heel and kept walking, only jumping a little when he appeared at her elbow again. "There are things you need to know," he told her urgently. "Things that could get you and I both killed, but things that can also keep you and your lover boy safe." He tugged on her sleeve, and Alex rolled her eyes but stopped. 

"What's your name?" she asked, crossing her arms over her chest. The man swallowed, and his eyes shifted away from her face. "I want the truth," she added, bringing his gaze back to her own.

"My name's Gabriel, okay?"

"Gabriel? Like the archangel, Gabriel?" Alex backed away slowly wishing Dean was here to help her. They told her Cas was the only angel that could be trusted, and now here she was standing in front of one of the most powerful beings in existence. Shit.

He nodded and stepped towards her. "Alex," he started. 

"I'd really like to go back now," she choked out, reaching down into her boot for her knife. 

"Alex, wait, just--" He huffed and put his hands on his hips. "You're not gonna get very far, ya know!"

"I don't care. Just stay away from me, okay? I'm not a threat to you. Ow, shit!" she cried as she tripped and fell backwards, hitting her head on a rock. It wasn't hard enough to knock her out, but after the ghost from earlier pounding away on her skull, it was enough to leave her with a massive headache.

Gabriel sighed and held out a hand to her, one she just stared at as she rubbed her head. He rolled his eyes and snapped his fingers, and suddenly the pain was gone. Even her shoulder wasn't sore. Again, he held out a hand.

"Um, thanks," Alex muttered as she grabbed on and he hauled her to her feet.

"I'm not here to hurt you, Alex. I'm here to talk." He motioned to the area around him agitatedly. "Now can we please get on with this before someone finds out where we are?"

"Okay," she whispered. 

"So your mom left? When was that?"

"I, I was just a kid," Alex stammered. "She took off with a bunch of her clothes one night and never came back. I went to the neighbor the next day and got put into the system pretty soon after that..." She trailed off, looking anywhere but at Gabriel's face, and pushed her hair back. She knew what kind of look he'd be wearing. Archangel or not, her story always garnered the same reaction from everyone who heard it. Their brows would pull together, head would tilt, and a soft variation of "I'm so sorry" would leave their lips.

"She just left you there?" he growled, causing Alex's head to snap back to Gabriel's face. She shrunk back in fear at the restrained fury in his features and tried to come up with something, anything, to calm him down. "She was supposed to protect you! And she just abandoned you?" He turned, running a hand through his hair and pacing in a circle. "Then what happened?"

"I got adopted by this super boring, super strict couple, but we never saw eye to eye, and when I told them I wasn't going back to school after one year of community college, they kicked me out, cut ties with me completely." Gabriel stopped pacing and locked eyes with Alex. "I was on my own, but I survived."

"You always do, don't you?" he said quietly. 

"What do you mean?"

"Your mom left, you sought help. Your foster parents kicked you out, you kept on trucking. Your husband was murdered," he paused as Alex's eyes narrowed, "you found his killer. You lost your child and almost died yourself, and you teamed up with the two men who've saved this world more times than I can count."

"How the hell did you--"

"Billie isn't the only one who's been watching you, Alex. It took me a while to track you down, and I was going to keep my distance, but you just kept getting deeper and deeper into this crap. I felt like it was time you knew--"

Alex cut him off with a sharp right hook to his jaw that did more damage to her hand than it did his face, but still she advanced, grabbing the collar of his shirt and jerking him closer. "You knew?" she growled. "My baby is dead, and you just watched it happen? Screw you, Gabriel! Screw you and all the other angels up there!" She shoved him hard in the chest, knocking him back a few steps with the shock of her attack. "I begged God to help, to keep us safe, and you just watched?" Alex grew quiet, the silence heavier than her fury in the night air. "Fuck you," she muttered, her voice just barely reaching his ears, and she turned to walk away. 

"Alex!" Gabriel called out, earning himself the bird over Alex's head as she stomped off. "Oh yeah, real mature! I couldn't intervene until I was sure it was you! Do you hear me? I wanted to help, but be honest, Alex, do you really think this would've been the best life for A.J.?" 

She stopped and glanced over her shoulder. "You don't get to say her name," Alex growled. 

Gabriel took the opportunity to approach her slowly from behind, knowing the next bit of information would upset her even more than what he'd already said. "Alex, how do you think you survived all this time? You should've died with her, and you should've died in that town that was wiped off the map. You should've died at the hands of that sick freak that raped you and beat you bloody, but do you know why you didn't?" He stopped just inches away from her and placed a heavy hand on her shoulder, heart twisting as she flinched under his touch. "It's because you're special, Alex, stronger than most. When your mom got pregnant, I had to figure out a way to keep you safe. Every angel in heaven felt it when you were conceived, so I begged Dad to help me out. He wiped the memory from their minds while I extracted most of your grace. It left you mostly human, and the grace was nearly undetectable. Your mom was able to give birth and survive, and I was still under witness protection, so she agreed to care for you alone."

Alex turned slowly, curiosity taking over the anger still boiling in her veins. "What are you saying?" she asked as she faced him.

Gabriel reached into his shirt and pulled out a glowing vial hanging from his neck. "I'm your father, Alex."

Her brows furrowed as the edges of her vision went grey. "What the...?" she muttered as everything went sideways. 

The last thing she saw before everything went black was Gabriel kneeling over her and shaking his head.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much longer chapter, I know, but I couldn't drop it just anywhere. Enjoy!

"Al? Can you hear me?" 

The voice was muffled, like someone was speaking through a cotton handkerchief, but she could feel hear the panic in his voice as a warm hand cupped her cheek.

"Al, please wake up."

A crash as the door was slammed open.

"What happened?" Sam's voice, footsteps. 

"I don't know, man! We were kissing and she just passed out!" Shit. Dean was freaking out. C'mon, Alex thought. Open your eyes.

The sound of a faucet running. A cool cloth was placed on her forehead, and suddenly, a bright light blinded her.

"Ugh," she groaned, slapping the flashlight away.

"Al! Are you okay?" She blinked a few times and came face to face with the worried face of Dean Winchester. 

"Hi," she sighed, attempting to grin at him.

"Hi, yourself. What the hell was that?" Dean asked taking her face in both of his hands now.

Alex's eyes rolled around the room before locking onto the man standing in the corner. He raised an eyebrow and waved before crossing his arms back over his chest. "Gabriel," she hissed, missing the glance between the two brothers. Gabriel frowned and narrowed his eyes before disappearing into thin air. "Asshole," Alex grumbled and looked back to the man in front of her. "I'm fine, Dean, really." He pursed his lips and backed away but kept a hand on her arm.

"Alex," Sam started as he took a seat on the chair in front of her. How did she get from the bathroom to the bed? "Gabriel is dead. Lucifer killed him years ago."

She shook her head and raised an eyebrow at him. "Well unless you know of another archangel who goes by that name and carries candy bars around with him everywhere and, oh yeah, is a giant pain in my ass," Alex yelled, looking at the ceiling, "I'd say he's very much alive."

Sam shot another worried glance to his brother who shrugged and wrapped an arm around Alex's shoulders. She leaned into his side, sagging with relief after the emotional conversation she'd had with her supposed sperm donor, and closed her eyes. "Al?" Dean's voice rumbled from low in his chest. "Why don't you tell me what happened?"

She sighed and snuggled in closer, inhaling the scent of his skin. Turns out, Dean had forgotten to put his shirt back on when she passed out. "I said yes and was waiting for you to kiss me, but when I opened my eyes, I was sitting across from him. He started asking all these questions about my biological parents, and I tried to dodge the conversation, but he was so damned persistent that I gave in, but only after he told me who he really was." Her brows furrowed and she sat up as she remembered the conversation. "He was pissed that my mom had left me," Alex murmured. "He said he'd been watching me, and he knew about, about Jack and A.J., and everything that's happened since then. She huffed a surprised laugh and stared at Dean. "I punched him. Right in the jaw."

Dean offered a small smile that didn't quite reach his eyes and tightened his hold on her. "That's my girl."

"I chewed him out for not helping me, for not saving my family, and I started to leave again, but..."

"But what?" Sam asked with a tilt of his head.

"He told me he couldn't, that he had to make sure it was really me, that I was really his...his daughter." Dean stiffened beside her as Sam's eyes grew to the size of saucers.

"But that's impossible," Sam rushed out while his brother stood abruptly and wiped a hand down his face. "You'd have grace, and your mom never would have survived. Hell, the other angels would have killed you."

Alex shrugged and followed Dean's agitated movements. He looked like a caged animal, too much energy just waiting to be unleashed. "He said he'd made a deal with God. Gabriel would extract my grace so I was mostly human when I was born if God would wipe the angels' memories so they never knew I existed. I guess it worked."

Dean turned and glared at Alex, his anger and frustration reaching unbearable levels. "And you never knew?" he gritted. 

"I--"

"You never once felt something extra flowing in your veins, huh? Never felt, oh I don't know, different?" Dean thundered.

"Dean, I just found out myself. How could I have possibly known before?" she asked, clenching her jaw at his reaction.

"Dean, just calm down," Sam interjected, trying to bring everyone's emotions back down to a more reasonable level.

"I am calm!" Dean snapped before striding quickly over to where Alex sat on the end of the bed and stood over her. "You'd better start explaining yourself," he said lowly. 

Alex stood and met him, chest to chest, and stared him right in the eyes, their noses nearly touching. "I told you everything I know as soon as I found out about it. What the hell else do you want me to say?"

Dean's jaw ticked as he looked into her eyes, trying and failing to see the lie. "Nothing," he said and grabbed his shirt and keys off of the table before storming out and slamming the door behind him.

Alex's chest heaved as she stared at the door, willing him to turn around, to come back. She felt the tears pricking behind her eyes and wiped them harshly away before running into the bathroom and locking the door behind her. She slid to the floor, arms wrapped around her knees, and cried as Sam's voice called to her from the other side. She didn't know exactly what he said, but shortly after he spoke, Alex heard the motel room door opening and being shut just seconds later. 

She sobbed louder without the audience outside and wondered how her night had gotten so turned around. She hid her face in her arms before she heard the flapping of wings and jerked her head up to see a pair of brown boots in front of her.

"Please go away," she choked out.

"I can't, kiddo." Gabriel sat down beside her and wrapped his arms around Alex's shoulders, pulling her in close. She grabbed onto his canvas jacket and hiccupped once as she tried to draw in a breath.

"I hate you," she cried.

Gabriel rested his cheek on the top of her head and sighed. "I know. I'm sorry."  
_____________

"Dean!" Sam shouted as he ran across the parking lot. His brother was just opening the door to his beloved Baby when Sam spotted him. 

He slammed the door shut and turned on Sam, the anger coming off him in waves. "What?" he snapped. 

"Just wait a second, alright?" He slowed to a stop at the rear bumper and shoved his hands in his jacket pockets. "Where are you going?"

Dean looked away, his jaw ticking. "Anywhere but here, Sam. I can't--" He waved a hand in the direction of the motel. "I can't be near her right now, man."

"I thought she meant something to you, Dean. You yourself said she was special, different from all the other girls!"

"Yeah, that's because she is," Dean shot back, stepping into Sam's space. "I knew there was something off about her, but I ignored my gut. A freaking nephilim? Really?" He shook his head and rubbed the back of his neck as he huffed a disgusted laugh. "God am I stupid." 

"Dean," Sam started, reaching out and grabbing his brother's sleeve, "Do you think this is easy for her? That woman has been through hell these last few weeks. She lost everything! And then, when she was just starting to open herself up to the idea of accepting her feelings for you, even AFTER you told her about hell and the mark? You get pissed and walk out. How is that fair?"

"She's not human, Sam!"

"Neither am I," he said quietly. "Not completely, anyway. I've got demon blood in my veins, remember? Besides, I've never seen you so happy." Dean glared at his little brother, who was now doing his best impression of a kicked puppy. Sam saw his resolve cracking, so he decided to break out the big guns. "You didn't mind so much when you screwed Anna in the Impala," he scoffed.

Dean rolled his eyes and jerked out of Sam's grasp before stomping back to the room. He knew he probably overreacted, but the information had blinsided him, and he didn't know how to take it. Sam was right, though, as much as Dean hated to admit it. She'd accepted Dean despite what he'd done in the past, had completely overlooked it because she saw something in him worthy of her time.

He glanced over his shoulder at Sam sitting on the trunk of the Impala. His brother grinned, undoubtedly knowing he had Dean by the short and curlies, and gave him a thumbs up. Dean groaned and turned back to unlock the door. 

"Al?" he called out as he opened the door. He scanned the room for her before his eyes fell on the closed bathroom door. He shut and locked the door behind him and quietly approached the bathroom. As he got closer, Dean heard the sound of Alex sobbing, and he shook his head with the knowledge that he was the cause of her heartbreak this time.

He raised a hand to knock, but was interrupted by an iron like grasp on his wrist. "I don't think she wants to talk to you, Dean-o." Dean followed the length of the arm to the body it was connected to and saw none other than Gabriel himself standing beside him.

"What do you know?" Dean growled. "You abandoned her for years, never lifted a finger to help!"

"I know more than you think. Who do you think she's been crying to the last ten minutes?" Gabriel challenged with a lift of his brow. Damn, that must be where she got it from. 

"She let you in?" Dean asked.

The angel nodded. "Someone had to catch her when she fell. For a while I thought that'd be you, but I guess I was wrong. You don't care about her," he sneered.

Dean pushed the angel against the wall and held him there with a forearm across his neck. "You don't know anything."

"Don't I?" Gabriel asked as the crying subsided on the other side of the door. Good, he thought. If he could push Dean a little more, then he wanted Alex to hear it. "The only thing you care about is getting some hot piece of tail!"

Dean saw red and slammed Gabriel harder against the wall. "Don't talk about her like that! That woman in there is a damn miracle, and I know I don't deserve her, but I'm trying, okay?"

"Pfft, you call this trying? Things got complicated, and you ran out of here faster than a nun in a whorehouse."

"But I came back. I came back because I was wrong, and because she's worth fighting for," Dean countered. 

"You really believe that?" 

Dean dropped Gabriel and spun to face Alex. He hadn't heard the bathroom door open, and he sure as hell didn't hear her walk up behind him. She was standing there with her arms crossed, a few stray tears still spilling down her face. 

He nodded. "Of course I do, Al."

She backed away and held up a hand when Dean tried to step closer, and he shrunk back, the hurt clear on his face. She wanted so badly to believe him, really she did, but his first reaction said so much more than his current words. Alex glanced behind Dean. "Give us a few minutes, Gabe. I'm good here." 

"Call if you need me, kid. I'll be here."

Alex snorted. "Right because you've been so dependable in the past." She sighed. "Yeah, I'll call."

He gave Dean a little push and pointed a finger at him. "Do right by her. I might not be around to save your ass next time you screw up," Gabriel said before disappearing. 

When he left, Alex climbed onto the bed and hugged a pillow to her chest before patting the spot beside her. Dean walked over and sat down but left a few inches between them. He wasn't sure if he was allowed to touch her yet.

"Get out of that head of yours, Dean. I can practically hear the self deprecating monologue from here," Alex said as she closed her eyes and leaned back against the headboard. "Why did you freak out earlier?"

He looked down at his hands, unable to face her as he confessed. "I thought it was all some sort of evil plan. You know, get close to one of us and rip the carpet out from under our feet. It's happened before," Dean finished quietly, recalling Sam's unconventional relationship with Ruby.

"Dean, I thought you knew better than that. I don't want anything from you. I just," she pushed her hair back and stared at the man beside her, "I just want to be with you, that's all."

Dean swallowed hard and wiped a hand down his face. She didn't understand, didn't know how many times he'd been betrayed by those he thought he could trust. "You don't get it. Everyone wants something." 

"Hey," she said, pulling his face up to look at her. He clenched his jaw and forced himself to look down away from her. "Look at me," she ordered. Reluctantly, he brought his eyes up to her own, the pain and vulnerability of being hurt one too many times showing through. "You're worthy of love, Dean."

"Love?" he asked, voice rough with emotion. He hated how easily he opened up to her.

"Yeah, love." Alex gave him a small smile and ran a hand through his hair. "You're still dirty," she laughed. 

"Never had a chance to clean up," he smirked before sobering up. "I meant what I said to Gabriel. You're special, Al, and I don't want to let you go." Alex looked down as a blush rose colored her cheeks. "You're pretty cute, too," he grinned, making her blush harder.

"You can't just go around saying stuff like that, Dean," she told him, pushing him away with a smile and standing up.

He watched her dog through her duffel and pull out a change of clothes. "I'm sorry I got mad, Al. I'm sorry I hurt you."

"Just don't let it happen again, huh?" she asked as she strode to the bathroom. 

"Need a hand?" he called.

Alex stuck her head out the door and grinned. "Maybe later, handsome. I need some rest first." She shut the door as Dean relaxed back on the pillows. They were gonna be okay.


	3. Chapter 3

Alex smiled softly at Dean as she exited the bathroom, her dark hair still dripping down the back of her t-shirt. "It's all yours," she said before tossing her toiletry bag on top of her duffel.

He had nearly fallen asleep while she showered, but something about seeing her all fresh faced and relaxed awakened something in Dean, and instead of going into the bathroom, he stepped quietly behind her as she pulled the heavy curtains closed to block out the light of day. He slipped his arms around her waist, pulling her back against his chest and nuzzling at her neck.

She groaned and laid her hands on top of his while rolling her head to the side to give him better access. "Dean," Alex breathed.

"Hmm?" he rumbled as he continued his ministrations on her skin, lightly sucking just below her jaw.

She squeezed his hands lightly. "Dean, I, I really need to sleep." He paused and lifted his head as she turned to stare into his green eyes, hating herself for stopping what was sure to follow if his darkened gaze was anything to go on. "Please?" 

"Yeah, okay," Dean whispered before placing a gentle kiss on her jaw and cupping her face with his hand. "I'll try to hurry, but you get some rest, alright?"

She nodded, and he shot her a grin before heading into the bathroom. His clothes from before were still on the counter where he left them, but Dean noticed they were now folded, and he laid a hand lightly on top of the pile, smiling again as he thought of Alex taking the time to do that for him. 

Dean hurried through his routine, scrunching his nose at the amount of dirt that washed down the drain. God, he really was dirty. He stepped out of the shower and wrapped the scratchy motel towel around his hips before running the smaller hand towel over his hair. He shaved quickly and brushed his teeth before pulling on his boxer briefs and pausing. Should he put more clothes on, or was this enough? Would Alex freak out if she woke up and he was half naked? He frowned but settled for the safer bet, not wanting to upset her again, and grabbed his t-shirt. He could sleep without the sweatpants, it was too hot for those anyway. 

Dean opened the door and was momentarily caught off guard by the dark room, but as his eyes adjusted, a warm and--though he'd never admit it--fuzzy feeling settled in his chest. Alex was curled up in a ball on the bed nearest to the door and clutching the comforter to her chest. Her brows were pulled together, and a small frown pulled at the corners of her mouth, but still she was beautiful. 

He flipped the bathroom light off and made his way over to the other side of the bed, slipping under the covers and wrapping an arm around her waist. Alex rolled towards him, humming softly, and nestled into the space under Dean's chin, and his heart swelled just a little bit more as he pressed a hand to the small of her back and held her close. Nephilim or not, she'd stolen his heart, and he wasn't about to let her go. 

"Glad to see you're not the douchewad I thought you were."

Dean rolled his eyes, the abrupt appearance of an angel no longer having the same effect on his heart that it used to thanks to so many years with Cas. "What do you want, Gabriel?" he hissed, trying not to wake Alex. 

"Relax, would ya?" Gabriel was leaning against the wall behind Alex, his arms and feet crossed casually. He met Dean with a level stare. "I'm keeping tabs on our girl. Get used to it."

"Our girl?" Dean scoffed. "You don't know anything about her, and you certainly don't have the right to call her anything other than the result of your broken condom."

Gabriel clenched his jaw, tamping down his anger for the sake of the woman sleeping in front of him. "I did everything I could to keep her safe, Dean. You of all people know what Heaven is capable of. What do you think they'd do to her once they found out she existed? She doesn't have the power that Jack does, so she couldn't defend herself against them, not yet anyway."

"What do you mean 'not yet'?" Dean asked, his heart starting to pound. The archangel pulled on the cord around his neck, revealing a small vial glowing a brilliant, swirling gold. Understanding crossed Dean's face as he swallowed. "Is, is that...?"

"Her grace? You betcha, bucko. Once I extracted it, I never let it go. Couldn't risk someone finding it." Gabriel's eyes fell to Alex's resting form, and he softened a bit. "She's not ready for it yet, but she will be, soon. Take care of her til then, Dean," he said seriously. "She's going to need your support when it all goes down."

"When what goes down?"

Gabriel's eyebrows rose. "You haven't heard? Michael, the one who's currently pulling apart your mom piece by piece, is looking for a way to get here, and he's not looking to make friends." 

The archangel vanished with a flap of his wings, and an uneasy feeling settled in Dean's stomach. Their Michael was a force to be reckoned with, but the other one, the one who'd already conquered one earth? Dean couldn't imagine the power he held. He squeezed his eyes shut and buried his nose in Alex's dark hair, inhaling her scent and praying for the first time in a while that Chuck was watching out for them.  
_____________

Alex awoke with her nose buried in the soft cotton of a well worn shirt and smiled. It was the first time she'd slept peacefully in weeks, and she silently thanked whoever was responsible for the reprieve. 

A low hum vibrated through the chest in front of her, and a warm hand pressed against her back as fingers ran through her hair. She opened her eyes and peeked up at the man staring down at her. "G'morning," he said, voice rough with sleep.

"Mornin', handsome," she whispered, face stretching into a grin.

He cocked an eyebrow at her cheerful mood. "Sleep good?" Dean asked.

"Slept great," Alex told him, hooking a leg over his hip and running a hand down his cheek. His eyes widened, but otherwise he stayed still, letting her take the lead.

Alex pressed a kiss to his lips before rolling so she was straddling him and worked her way down his jaw. Dean huffed as she sucked on the skin over his pulse point before soothing it with her tongue, and he gripped her hips, pulling her core against him. "Al," he moaned, earning him a wicked grin from the woman working him over. "Al, I am really, really enjoying this, but uh," he licked his lips as she stared up at him, "are you sure you want this?"

Alex's gaze softened as she tilted her head to the side. She planted a long, slow kiss to his lips, their mouths melding together like it was their job, and nodded when she pulled away. "Dean, I am beyond ready for you."

That was all he needed to hear.

Dean wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her tightly against his chest, and flipped them so that he was on top. Alex giggled at the sudden move and ran her hands under the back of Dean's shirt feeling the ripple of his muscles as he moved above her, dipping down to taste the exposed skin near her collarbone. He nipped lightly and smiled against her neck as she groaned. "Like that?" he rasped.

She ground her hips against his own, feeling the hard length of him between her legs. "Oh, God, yes."

Alex tugged on his shirt, and Dean sat up briefly to pull it over his head before tossing it over the edge of the bed. Her hands were on him immediately, running over the firm planes of his chest and caressing the softer pudge of his abdomen. Dean kept in pretty good shape, but years of fast food and his increasing age had caught up with him. He was no longer ripped like he used to be, but he knew he still looked good. He was pulled from his thoughts as Alex ran her tongue up from his waist band to his naval. "Jesus," he hissed. He hadn't even noticed when she'd sat up, but he was sure paying attention now as her lips landed on his tattoo.

Alex peered up at him through her long lashes before kissing his chest softly and pulling her shirt overhead, her heart pounding with nerves. She laid back down as Dean's eyes roamed over her, taking in every curve, every stretch mark, every flaw, and she blinked before looking away, unable to take the disappointment she was sure to see in his eyes.

"Hey," he whispered, turning her face back to his. "Don't hide from me." He moved down her body, kissing and tracing her skin with his tongue. "You're beautiful, and you have nothing to be ashamed of." Alex blushed, and Dean grinned as he saw how much of her body it covered. His hands ran down her sides, and he frowned when he reached the long scar on her lower belly, eyes flicking up to meet hers with worry. "Al, what--?"

"C-section," she said quickly, cutting him off. "I, it was an emergency. I was bleeding too much, and A.J. was stuck, and I," she swallowed back the growing lump in her throat and sucked in a deep breath. "They had to remove my uterus. We didn't really have much of a choice."

"Oh baby," Dean murmured, kissing the scar before moving back up to kiss her lips. 

She fought back the tears and put everything she had into the kiss as she pulled him closer. Alex moaned softly into Dean's mouth when his thumb brushed across her nipple, and she arched against him when he rolled it between his fingers and tugged. 

She broke the kiss to stare up at him, her chest heaving against his, and reached down to push her panties off of her hips before grasping the sides of his underwear. Dean kissed her jaw and whispered, "I want this Al, but you can stop anytime if you're unsure. I promise I won't be upset if you say no."

She answered by pulling down on his waistband and helping him shimmy out of the last scrap of clothing between them before wrapping her hand around his length. He shuddered against her, burying his face in her neck as she stroked him, and he reached down to grip her wrist. "Don't want to end the party too soon, Al," Dean smirked. 

Alex was about to retort when she gasped, gripping Dean's shoulders while he pressed a finger into her, crooking it as he pulled out just as slowly as he'd entered. "Right there," she breathed while he pumped, adding another finger. "Oh wow, Dean. That's so good."

"You're dripping," he groaned as he pulled his hand away and kissed her again. She whimpered at the loss, but was rewarded when he lined himself up with her entrance. He locked onto her eyes, using every ounce of willpower within himself to hold still, and scanned her face for any sign that she didn't want this.

Alex bit her lip and nodded, hooking her legs around his waist. Dean pressed in carefully, giving her plenty of time to adjust, before moving the rest of the way in. He huffed when he was fully seated, hips meeting hers and relishing the feel of her body around him. He hadn't realized his eyes had closed until he felt Alex's lips on his jaw. She kissed her way to his mouth, and her breath hitched when he stared at her.

"Move, Dean," she whispered. 

He did.

Dean began pumping in and out of her at an agonizingly slow pace while his arms shook on either side of her head. Alex leaned up, kissing his jaw, his neck, wherever she could reach while she pulled him deeper with her legs. 

They were both panting now, and Dean sped up, spurred on by the increasing volume of her little gasps and moans. He knew he was getting close, and he wouldn't last much longer if she kept rolling her hips like that, so he snaked a hand between them and rubbed small circles into her clit with his thumb.

Alex tightened around him, the coil in her belly winding until she thought she couldn't take anymore. She came hard, biting down on Dean's shoulder as she spasmed, her legs trembling. 

"Oh, God, Al," Dean choked out while his hips stuttered. His thrusts became erratic as he chased his own end, and he came moments later with a groan, clinging to her body beneath him as he filled her. 

They lay there staring at each other as their breathing slowed, and Dean rolled over, pulling her onto his chest with a smile. He was running his fingers in random patterns across her back when something over her shoulder caught his eye.

Dean leaned up, pushing Alex onto her belly beside him, and took in the wings tattooed across her back. "Wow."

"Sorry, I uh, forgot to mention these. It's the only one I have."

"It fits you," he smirked, running his hand over the feathers. 

Alex shook her head, staring at Dean while he examined her back. "If only I'd known then that I was the daughter of an archangel," she said dryly.

Dean's eyes met hers briefly before going back to the ink on her skin. "I love it," he mumbled. "It's perfect."

After a while, Alex rolled onto her side, and Dean pulled her back up against his chest, tangling his legs with hers, and he placed a kiss on her shoulder while lacing their fingers together. 

"I love you, Al," he whispered. 

She kissed his knuckles and closed her eyes.

"I love you, too, Dean."


	4. Chapter 4

Alex would have been content to lie in Dean's warm embrace forever, but the pressure on her bladder and sticky mess between her thighs had other ideas. She hugged his arm against her chest briefly before crawling out of bed and heading into the bathroom. 

"Don't take too long," Dean called from the bed without opening his eyes. "Gets cold without you.

Alex smiled softly, enjoying the utter state of peace Dean was in, and closed the door behind her. She cut the sink on and used the bathroom while the water heated up, her body still buzzing from her orgasm. That man definitely knew what he was doing, but it was so much more than just a physical thing. Alex swore she could see his soul when he looked at her, and she wanted to drown in its lovely depths.

She grabbed the washrag she'd used in the shower and ran it under the hot water before cleaning Dean's traces from her folds. Alex rinsed it well and hung it over the towel rack to dry and started to wash her hands when the vanity light glinted off of her wedding set, catching her eye. She hurriedly finished up as she stared at her wedding and engagement rings nestled in the indentation on her finger. 

Suddenly, they felt as though they weighed a ton, and her heart dropped. Was what she did right? It's not like she'd cheated on Jack, but still...

Alex took in a shaky breath, steeling her nerves, and walked back into the main room to get dressed. Dean cracked an eye open while she moved around, so Alex planted a kiss on his temple. 

"I'm just gonna grab some coffee, maybe a few biscuits, and I'll be right back, I swear."

He grunted in response and rolled over onto his stomach, burying his face in the pillow. Alex grinned at his antics and grabbed a room key from the table before slipping outside and heading to the gas station across the street. She needed caffeine if her mind was going to assault her today.  
_____________

Dean's nose twitched as he woke up. Was that...smoke? He bolted upright in bed, instantly alert and looking for Alex. He deliberately avoided the ceiling for fear that, even though Azazel was long dead, the woman he loved would be suffering above him. He breathed a sigh of relief when he saw her sitting at the small table in the room and ran a hand through his hair while he searched for what woke him. 

His eyes landed on a cheap cigar resting on the edge of an ashtray, and Dean scrunched his nose. "I didn't know you smoked, Al."

She glanced at the ashtray before staring back down at her hands. "I don't," she said softly.

Dean grabbed his underwear and went into the bathroom to relieve himself when her words hit him. He flushed the toilet, washed his hands, and returned to the main room, taking a seat across from her. Alex pushed a cup of coffee towards him but didn't meet his eyes. Ouch.

"Hey, uh, if you don't smoke, then what's with all this?" he asked, waving a hand at the cigar.

"Jack used to smoke one every now and then," she mumbled, twisting her rings around her finger. She huffed a tired laugh and continued to avoid Dean's gaze. "I tried to make him quit, but he wouldn't. Never thought it'd be some witch bitch to take him out instead."

Dean reached across the table and covered her hands with his own. "Alex," he said softly. "What's going on?"

With dead eyes, Alex pulled her left hand out from his hold and held it up for him to see. He didn't notice anything unusual except...oh. Her wedding set was where it normally sat on her ring finger, but on her thumb was a solid gold band, undoubtedly the one that belonged to Jack. She sighed and slipped the ring off, opting instead to spin it on the table in front of her silently. Dean watched it fall several times before Alex spoke. 

"I wore my wedding rings while I slept with another man, Dean," she said slowly, as if trying to come to terms with what she'd done. She shrugged and held up Jack's in front of her face. "I pulled this bad boy out of my bag as soon as I got back. Couldn't help it." Her eyes fell on the man in front of her as she paused. "I feel like I cheated on him."

Her words fell flat but stung him like he'd been slapped in the face. Dean Winchester was a lot of things, and he'd been known to love 'em and leave 'em his whole life, but he was never one to go after an attached woman. That's part of the reason he'd tried to stay away from her at first. She was a friggin widow, a brand new one for pete's sake. She was still hurting, and he'd made things a lot more complicated for her.

"I didn't," she said, interrupting his thoughts. "I know, logically, that I didn't do anything wrong, that I didn't cheat, but I mean, I still feel bad about it. We promised that it was me and him, forever, that there would never be anyone else, and he's not in the ground more than a couple of months before I'm shacked up with someone else." Alex shook her head and rested it in her hands as she closed her eyes. "I don't know why I even wear the damn ring anymore," she mumbled. 

Dean got up and moved over so that he was crouched down beside her chair. "Hey," he said softly, placing a hand on her jean-covered thigh. "You still love him, Al, of course you do, and those still represent what you built together. There's nothing wrong with that, but," he swallowed and licked his lips before staring back up at her, "but wouldn't he want you to be happy? To move on?" A tear rolled down the side of her face as he spoke. "I'm willing to wait on you, Al, if that's what you need, but I'm not willing to say that what we did," he rapped a fist on his chest, "what I feel, is wrong. I won't."

Alex looked down and saw the sincerity on Dean's face. "I don't know what to do with these," she said, running a thumb over her band. "I'm not ready to let go of them just yet."

He stretched up and placed a kiss on her temple. "Hang on to them. We'll figure something out." 

Sam picked that moment to knock on the door. 

"Man, we gotta work on your timing," Dean told him, as he closed the door behind his little brother.

Sam glanced at Alex before turning a questioning gaze back to Dean, who shook his head. "So, uh, I was thinking about grabbing some lunch before we head out, but it looks like you've already eaten."

"Nah," Alex said, turning around. "I just got us coffee. Sorry, I didn't know when you'd show up."

"No, it's fine. Don't worry about it."

Dean laid a hand on his brother's shoulder. "Hey, why don't you go check us out while we get packed up? We'll meet you at the car." Sam nodded and left without a word, the door clicking shut softly behind him. 

Alex was still sitting at the table when Dean finished getting dressed, and he pulled her up into a tight hug. She went willingly into his arms and clutched the back of his flannel shirt. Dean rested his chin on the top of her head, squeezing his eyes shut while he held her. "C'mon, kid. Let's get our stuff together and get out of here." She sniffed and nodded against his chest but made no move to step away, so he planted a kiss on her hair and held her a little longer.  
_____________

"So what's the plan?"

They were sitting in the back corner booth of a small roadside diner just south of Coyote Springs, and Alex was staring up at Dean expectantly. Dean glanced at his brother before swallowing the bite he was currently chewing and took a sip of his drink. "Well, we are pretty close to a city with some of the best tattoo artists in the world, and, uh, I know you already have the one, but you kinda need to get another for protection."

She raised an eyebrow at him as Sam rolled his eyes and pulled down the collar of his shirt. "It's to keep you from getting possessed," he explained. "You can't be too careful, especially now that you're riding with us. We tried to get Jack one, but he's fully powered, so that didn't exactly end well."

"Okay," Alex said. "Vegas it is." 

Dean's eyes widened. "Just like that?"

"Just like that," she said, tapping Dean's thigh. "I'm not all that hungry, so I'll meet you in the car, okay?"

"Yeah, sure," he replied, sliding out and standing. He dug down into his pocket and pulled out his keys. "Here," he said as he handed them to her. "Put some music on. There's a box of tapes under the front seat." 

Alex smiled gratefully and kissed his cheek, causing Dean's heart to flutter in his chest. He watched her leave before his eyes fell on something by the front door. An idea struck him, and he threw some cash on the table. "Box mine up, I'll eat it later," he told Sam. "There's something I need to take care of."

He followed Alex outside and slid in the front seat while she dug through the tapes.

"That was fast," she commented. "Where's Sam?"

"He's finishing up," Dean said, taking her hand. 

"Dean, what--"

"Here." He held up a thin black cord and looked her in the eye while slipping off her rings, including Jack's that she still wore on her thumb, and threaded them onto the makeshift necklace. "It's not much, but I figure it'll do for now." 

Alex's eyes drifted closed while Dean fastened the clasp behind her neck. When he sat back and looked at her, she threw her arms around him and kissed him thoroughly. "Thank you," Alex whispered against his lips.

Dean smiled and threaded his fingers through her dark hair, pulling her closer. His tongue traced her lower lip, and Alex opened willingly for him as she climbed into his lap, a knee to either side of his waist. 

"So," Dean panted between kisses. 

Alex pulled back to stare at him, her eyes dark. "So what?"

"I take it you're feeling better?" he asked while gripping her hips.

"Ass," she whispered before tugging on his earlobe with her teeth. 

"Hey I'm just trying to gauge your mood here."

Alex ground down against the hard length of Dean's cock through his jeans, drawing a moan from him while she kissed his soft lips again. "Does that answer your question?"

"I'm really regretting checking out of that motel now," Dean grunted.

"Seriously?!" 

Alex chuckled while Dean snapped his head towards the window. 

"Dean, it's the middle of the frickin' day!" Sam tossed the takeout box in the front seat and gave his brother a bitch face for the books.

Dean smirked at Sam before turning back to Alex. "Vegas first, then we finish this."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, a little more angst in this chapter, but I felt like it made sense given Alex's history. Let me know what you guys think, and as always, thanks for reading!


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was difficult for me to write. There are some things going on in my life that have kept me...distracted I guess the last couple of days, so if there's some kind of error in the storyline or characterization, please let me know. I tried to do my best, but my head is about as clear as muddy water right now.
> 
> Enjoy, and thanks for reading!

Alex hadn't let Dean go into the shop with her when she got the antipossession tattoo, which left him fuming. Now though as she walked out to the car, his face had smoothed some, and she smiled to herself. 

"So," Dean asked from his spot on the hood, "where is it?"

Alex quirked an eyebrow at him. "That's a bit of need to know information, handsome. Can't go giving that out to just anyone."

He pushed off the windshield and turned so that his feet were dangling off the side of Baby and pulled Alex into the space between his knees. "I'm not just anyone, Al," he smirked.

"Well I guess you'll find out later then, won't you? Patience is a virtue."

Dean narrowed his eyes playfully before sliding down to the ground. "I'm not known for my patience," he murmured. 

They were chest to chest at this point, but Alex wasn't one to be intimidated so easily. She bit her lower lip and tilted her head back to stare at him as the light faded behind him, silhouetting him in deep orange and pink hues. He pushed a strand of hair away from Alex's face, and she leaned into his palm, savoring the warmth radiating off of his body.

"Good thing its one of my best assets," she sighed, eyes drifting closed.

Dean smirked. Two could play at this game. He leaned in close enough to feel Alex's breath on his skin before whispering in a low voice. 

"Good," he rumbled and pulled away.

Alex stood there with a bewildered expression on her face while Dean slipped behind the wheel. She pursed her lips and turned to see Dean grinning ear to ear at her through the windshield while Sam shook with the force of his laughter. She bit the inside of her cheek, but it barely concealed the smile pulling at her lips.

"Sammy," Alex announced as she settled into the back.

"Wh-what?" he asked, still chuckling. 

She lifted an eyebrow and leveled a fierce gaze at the green eyes in the rearview mirror. "You're bunking with Dean tonight. I think I'd like my own room." 

Dean gaped at her before clamping his mouth shut, the tick returning to his jaw, while Sam threw his head back and howled. 

"Well?" Alex smirked. "Are we getting some rooms or not?" 

Dean swore under his breath and started the engine, cranking up the radio to drown out his little brother's voice. No way in hell was he sleeping with Sam tonight. Not after he'd gotten used to waking up wrapped around the woman in the backseat.  
_____________

The motel door swung open silently and the figure outside advanced, shutting the door before a trace of light could enter the room. He crept forward, inching steadily towards the sleeping woman in bed with the ease of someone who had spent most of their life in the shadows. One large hand reached forward and--

"Dean Winchester, I swear if you don't get in this bed, I'll lay your ass out here and now."

"Son of a bitch," he grumbled.

Alex rolled over, and though she couldn't see a hand in front of her face, she instinctively knew where he was standing, and pulled back the covers for him. "Hi," she whispered when he got settled next to her.

The corners of Dean's mouth quirked up, and he pulled her in close, tucking Alex's head beneath his chin. "Hey. How'd you know it was me?"

"I figured you'd try something like this when you thought I was asleep. That's why I didn't latch the chain on the door. I knew you were coming," she told him as she snuggled into his chest.

Dean ran a hand along her thigh feeling the smooth skin there. She was only wearing a t-shirt and underwear, and he was suddenly grateful for the warm weather hunt that led them here. "I couldn't sleep without you now if I tried," he admitted, hiking her shirt up and resting his hand on the exposed skin of her hip.

"Ditto, handsome."

She yawned, and Dean chuckled, the sound rumbling deep in his chest. "Get some sleep, Al. We'll head home tomorrow."

Alex hummed, already half asleep. "Love you, Dean."

Dean hadn't ever been great at expressing his emotions. He preferred to let his actions speak for himself and saved the heartfelt words for those times he or someone he loved was near death, but Alex...she'd awoken something deep within his soul that Dean Winchester thought himself incapable of. He tightened his hold on her and placed a gentle kiss on her head. "I love you, too Al," he whispered. 

He held Alex until her breathing evened out. Then, Dean backed a few inches away, being careful not to wake her as he extricated his arms from around her, and propped up on one elbow to watch her face.

She looked peaceful, the frown that usually pulled at her features as she slept gone for now, and Dean sent a silent prayer to Gabriel to keep the nightmares away. He wasn't sure, but he suspected the angel was the one responsible for the decrease in bad dreams the last couple of nights. 

Why is she still here? The thought rolls around in Dean's head all the time, but now, in the middle of the night, with darkness all around them, the words echo through his mind. It's all he can hear. Not even the sound of Alex's steady breathing can break the loop. Why? Why? Why? 

Dean sighed quietly and thought back to the first time he saw her. She was sitting at her kitchen table when her best friend had led them in. An untouched mug of coffee was in front of her, the steam no longer rising from it, and Alex watched her daughter play with cold, lifeless eyes. She didn't even look up as they entered and flashed their badges, just continued to stare at the toddler. He and Sam had tried to interview her about her husband's death, but she'd been so...broken that they'd barely gotten a word out of her. Dean had been the one to reach out and cover her hand with his own, effectively breaking the trance as Alex's eyes flashed to his face, all at once terrified and hurt, and Jessica finally intervened when it looked like Alex was starting to tear up. The blonde woman ushered them out the front doors with promises to call if anything came up. As the door clicked shut behind him, even then Dean knew deep down she was different. 

It all spiralled from there.

While they were in town, he thought about her. When he forced himself and then Sam to leave, he thought about her. When they got to the bunker, Alex haunted his thoughts on the regular. Dean felt so guilty for leaving without giving her the satisfaction that only justice can supply. He failed her, and for some reason, that got under his skin more than an unfinished hunt.

Dean tried, God did he try, to forget about Alex, her face, her hair, the look in her eyes when she stared up at him...Dean shuddered at the memory. He'd seen so much of himself in that one look, and later, when they returned to Tennessee and he learned more about the woman, he understood why. 

She had lost so many people. Her parents were never really there, her foster parents abandoned her, and then her husband--her partner--had been stolen from her. It wasn't fair. She didn't deserve all that. And then to lose the only other people in her life, Dean didn't understand how she got out of bed every day. 

He should have been strong enough to leave her at the hospital. She would have healed in her own time, and she never would have crossed paths with Billie or those sons of bitches in Oklahoma. Gabriel probably wouldn't have contacted her either. Alex could be at home right now, picking up the pieces of her life and moving on, but she's been suffering instead all because Dean wasn't strong enough to walk away.

Dean brushed a piece of hair away from her face and let his fingers linger on her skin. She'd changed the way he looked at life. Before, it was all about taking care of Sam. Dean knew his mom and Cas could take care of themselves, but a lifetime of always watching out for his brother wasn't something that would just disappear. 

Then Alex showed up.

He hadn't forgotten about his brother, but now Dean was caring for two people. He was making sure Alex ate and slept and wasn't getting hurt, at least, as much as she'd let him anyway. He was still berating himself for the ghost hunt that screwed up her shoulder. He should have been the one outside the hole facing off with that spirit, but no. He had convinced himself it'd be a good learning experience and that she'd needed a break from digging. 

Idiot.

Stupid. 

Careless.

Incompetent. 

Why the hell she even returned with them to the motel he'd never know. Dean obviously couldn't keep her safe. They were literally inches apart when Gabriel stole her away for a little pow wow, and Dean couldn't do a damn thing about it.

As if sensing the turn Dean's mood had taken, Alex reached out, searching for him, and didn't stop until he caught her hand and kissed her knuckles. That seemed to settle her some, so Dean rolled onto his back and pulled her onto his chest, his arm securely around her once more. Alex released a soft sigh and snuggled closer, burying her face in his shirt, and Dean's heart swelled a little more. He couldn't let her go, especially now that she could have a price on her head. No, he was never going to be able to walk away from Alex, not unless she told him to, and even then, he'd watch from a distance and make sure she was safe.

Dean still doesn't think he deserves to even be in Alex's presence, let alone her heart, but he's not sorry for loving her. He'll never be sorry for that.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New chapter! You guys still with me? Let me know what you think!

Dean returned to Sam's room the next morning to shower and dress, then when everyone was ready, they grabbed a quick breakfast and hit the road heading for Kansas. Alex was enjoying being stretched out across the backseat, her bare feet propped below the open window, while she listened to the brothers talk or bicker about the radio station. Sometimes she sided with Sam, sometimes Dean, but she always belted out the lyrics to her favorites. Dean's green eyes would flick up to stare at her every now and then, and when she caught him in the act, he'd smile and shake his head with a chuckle, tiny creases forming around his eyes. 

A few hours into the trip, they pulled off the road at a gas station to fill up, and Alex took the opportunity to run to the restroom. She was washing her hands when a familiar voice sounded behind her.

"You seem happy," Billie remarked, her voice dripping with judgement.

Alex whirled around, pulling the knife from her waist as she moved and held it up, the silver blade pointing towards the grimy tile below. "What do you want from me?" Alex asked. She wanted to sound more confident than it came out, but it was freaking Death standing there.

Billie crossed her arms and raised a brow. "Just checking in," she said as her eyes narrowed. 

"Why?" Alex Wade would NOT shake in front of Billie. She wouldn't, she wouldn't, she wouldn't. 

"You're different," Billie said simply. "More...aware."

She knows who I really am, Alex thought. Shit.

She shrugged, trying to play it off. "I went on my first ghost hunt. It was eye opening."

"Alex, tell the truth when you speak to me," Billie ordered, her dark eyes hardening under the fluorescent lights. "Gabriel, the archangel, he spoke to you. I can see traces of his grace where he healed your shoulder."

Alex swallowed hard and lowered her knife. "He said something's coming, didn't say what, just that we need to be ready."

"Gabriel came out of hiding to give you a tip?" Billie leaned forwards. "I doubt that. You know what I think?" Alex shook her head. "I think he told you his big secret. I think you met your daddy."

Alex's eyes widened, and she stepped back until her hips hit the porcelain sink behind her. Billie advanced, looking every bit the powerful entity she was, and Alex gripped the knife harder as she looked for a way out. Who was she kidding? She was dead when Billie popped up behind her.

A knock on the door followed by Dean's voice struck more fear in Alex's heart. He'd fight, too, and he'd die. She resolved to remain silent while she died and prayed to Gabriel to stop Dean from coming in. 

Billie stopped inches away and whispered. "Don't tell anyone what you know, Alex. It isn't safe out there." 

Alex blinked, and she was alone in the backseat of the Impala, Dean calling her name from outside the window above her head while he rapped his knuckles on the roof. She felt the blood drain from her face, and sat up to stare at him with wide eyes. The change in his body language was immediate, worry replacing his carefree expression. 

"Al?" he asked, opening the door and sliding in beside her. He cupped her face in his warm hands as his eyes roamed over her body. "What happened? What's wrong?"

"Billie," Alex whispered. "Dean, she knows."  
_____________

The rest of the ride back to the bunker was silent. After an hour or so, Sam tried to turn on the radio to lighten the mood, but he was met with a glare from the older Winchester, who spent most of his time white-knuckling the steering wheel and huffing impatient sighs whenever they got behind someone going minutely slower than they were. 

The atmosphere was thick with tension. They were all dreading what this could mean. If word got out about Alex, she would be hunted, but she lacked the power needed to fight back against most enemies. She'd sat back against the seat for a while after the shock of yet another dream had worn off, but now she was leaning forward, her head resting on her right forearm as her left hand played with the hair on the back of Dean's head and around his ear. He leaned into her touch, and his grip on the wheel loosened some as he released a quiet breath. 

"Dean?" Alex murmured. 

"Hmm?"

She pursed her lips as she tried to think of a good way to explain what she wanted to say. "I've been thinking a lot back here, and--" Alex paused as Dean stiffened, her hand going still in his hair. "I don't think Billie is a threat to me." The man relaxed some, obviously expecting worse news than what she'd told him.

"Why do you think that?" he asked after a few beats, glancing at her from the corner of his eye.

"She warned me not to tell anyone who I am. She said it wasn't safe. Honestly, I think if she wanted to hurt me she would have done it by now. She's had plenty of chances."

"She's right, Dean," Sam spoke up from the passenger seat. "Billie might actually be on our side here, or at least Alex's."

"I don't know, Sam," Dean told him as he reached up to capture Alex's hand with his own. The physical contact eased some of his fears by reassuring himself that she was safe at the moment. 

"I'm not saying we jump into bed with her," Sam insisted, earning a smirk from the woman in the backseat, "but it'd be nice to know for sure whether or not we can call on her should the need arise."

Dean squeezed Alex's hand gently and turned to look at her for a moment. "What do you think, Al? You wanna summon Death?"

"As long as we have plenty of backup, yeah." She brushed her hair back from her face and sighed. "I'll call Gabe when we get there, see if he can stop by. He'll probably want to know how she found out anyway."

"Sam," Dean said, "give Cas a call, too. Tell him to start heading our way."

Alex watched Sam pull out his phone and scroll through the contacts until he found the angel's number. He hit send, and Alex shook her head, amused by the thought of an angel needing a cell phone. She then wondered about Gabriel and what she'd say to him when she saw him again. Their last meeting had been incredibly awkward, what with all of her crying and whatnot. Would he even answer of she prayed to him?

"I'll always be here, kiddo," Gabriel said casually from beside her. 

Alex shrieked and jumped away while the car lurched to the side of the road before Dean stomped on the brakes. 

"What the hell?!" Sam yelled.

"Hiya, Sam! Long time no spoon," he grinned.

"Cut the crap, Gabriel," Dean growled, turning in his seat to face the archangel. "What are you doing here?"

"Alex called, so here I am," he explained, pulling the young woman closer and throwing an arm around her shoulders. "How ya doing?" Gabriel asked her.

"You scared the shit out of me!" Alex's tone was accusatory, but she relaxed easily in his hold. "I didn't mean to call you. How does that even work? I didn't address you directly, I don't think."

"Prayers don't have to be spoken," Dean told her. "Angels can sense longing and the feelings behind that longing. You had him on your mind, so that's probably why he showed when he did."

"Someone's been studying since we last hung out," Gabriel remarked while pointing at Dean with his free hand. 

"I was actually going to pray to you when we got to the bunker," Alex stated. "We need your help."

Gabriel's face morphed into an intense expression full of worry as the air around them changed with his shift in mood. "What's going on, kiddo?"

"It's Billie, she knows you're my father, and I don't think she wants to hurt me, but we need to make sure, and it'd be nice to have an archangel backing us up when we summon her." 

Gabriel's face went blank as Alex explained, and she bit her lip while she stared up at him, waiting for a response. Meanwhile, Sam mouthed a "What the fuck?" at his brother as the silence stretched on. It was out of character for the trickster to remain silent for so long, and frankly, it was putting both men on edge. 

Finally, Gabriel looked between Sam and Dean, his stoic expression firmly in place. "Whose idea was it to summon Death?" he asked quietly. 

The usually fierce hunters glanced at each other. Sam raised his eyebrows, but Dean shook his head. "Uh-uh, no. You're not putting the blame on me."

"But you're the one who--" 

"You brought it up!" Dean fired back, his voice rising. "'Oh, it'd be nice to know for sure,'" he mocked, quoting his brother's words from earlier. 

Alex huffed a small laugh at the exchange and looked to her dad (Is that what he was to her?) who continued to stare at them, his eyes hard.

"Sam, Dean," Gabriel said lowly, snapping their attention back to him, "I'll back you up, but Alex is not to be in the room when we call Billie. Understood?" He raised a brow and stared at Dean.

"Now wait just a second," Alex snapped. "I'm definitely going to be there! She's been talking to me this whole time!"

"No, Alex," Gabriel insisted, shaking his head. "I'm not going to put you in that kind of danger."

She opened her mouth to reply, but Dean cut her off. "He's right, Al. If things go bad...you can't be there for that. It's too risky."

Her jaw snapped shut with an audible click, and she glared at Dean. "And what if it does go wrong, and you don't make it out?" she demanded. "What then, Dean? You gonna leave me, too?" His brows pulled together as they stared at each other, but he didn't break eye contact. Alex took a deep breath and released it. "You don't have a good answer, do you? I'm going, whether you like it or not." She shrugged out of Gabriel's hold and crossed her arms over her chest before flopping back against the leather seat.

"I will beam you to another planet if I have to, Alex," Gabriel warned her.

"I don't care! What good is me being 'safe' if everyone I care about is dead?" she asked, voice breaking on the last word.

"Al," Dean started but stopped when she held up a hand. 

"Do whatever you want," Alex muttered as she stared at the grassy plain outside her window. "I'm tired of talking about it."

Dean's jaw clenched, and he turned around to grip the steering wheel again. "How far away is Cas?" he asked Sam.

"Couple hundred miles."

Dean nodded. "We'll do the ritual tomorrow, then." He started to put the car into drive, but when he looked up, they were in the garage at the bunker. Alex gasped at the change, and Dean's eyes flew to her in the mirror to make sure she was okay before landing on the angel.

Gabriel shrugged. "I don't like long rides," he smirked. "I'll go grab the pretty boy so we can gather the ingredients. We'll meet you back here later." He laid a hand on Alex's knee, and his face softened. "Sorry, kiddo. I'll see you tomorrow." She looked away, her jaw clenched, and stayed silent. With that, Gabriel disappeared.

Dean got out and popped the trunk, grabbing both his and Alex's duffels, but she wrenched it from his hand and strode down the hallway to her room. "Al!" Dean called, but she continued to walk away. He sighed, and glanced at his brother. "What are you staring at me like that for?"

"Let me talk to her," Sam offered. "I'll see if I can smooth things over before you go in."

The muscle in Dean's jaw ticked, but he threw his hands up in the air. "Fine, whatever."

Sam clapped Dean on the shoulder and grabbed his bag before heading after Alex. This should be interesting, he thought.


	7. Chapter 7

Alex was hastily pulling clothes out of her duffel bag when she heard a knock at the door.

"Dean, I said I'm done talking about it," she called without turning around. 

"It's Sam."

She spun around, the surprise and regret on her face. "Shit, Sam. I'm sorry! I didn't know it was you."

He shrugged and stuffed his hands in his pockets as he glanced around the bars walls. "Mind if I come in?" he asked. "I just want to make sure you're okay."

Alex rolled her eyes but waved him in and returned to sorting her laundry. "I'm still pretty pissed," she muttered angrily as Sam took a seat on the edge of her bed, one leg curled underneath him and the other dangling off the side.

"That's totally understandable." Her eyes widened as she looked up at him, and Sam continued. "When we were kids, Dean started hunting around the age of eight, so when I got that age I wanted to go, too, but Dad wouldn't let me. I always got so mad and threw these huge fits, but I didn't get to go for another couple of years."

Her face softened as Sam spoke, his words tugging at her heart. "You guys were so young..."

He inhaled sharply and stared at the wall behind Alex. "Dad wasn't great at being a typical 'dad,'" he told her with a failed attempt at a smile, "but I get now that he was just doing what he thought was best to keep us safe and alive. He put so much energy into that and into hunting the demon that he didn't have a while lot left over for us. The point is, he and Dean knew that I wasn't ready to hunt, regardless of what I thought, and I probably would have gotten myself or someone else killed if I'd gone before I was ready."

"You were a kid, though. I'm a full grown woman, and dammit I've already gone up against two monsters. I know how to defend myself." 

"Look," he said, a hand held out towards her, palm up on the bed, "this isn't just some witch or spirit. This is Death, and she can do some serious damage if she wants. It's not a fight to be taken lightly, and hopefully there won't be a fight at all. It's just..." Sam sighed and looked down. "You mean so much to Dean, and he's been through a lot, but I don't think he'd make it back from losing you. He'd blame himself, and it would kill him."

Alex grabbed his hand and gave it a gentle squeeze, causing Sam to look back at her, his puppy eyes firmly in place. She offered a small smile and wrapped her arms around his shoulders in a hug. "I'm not going anywhere, Sam. Why won't you guys get that through your thick skulls?" she joked, ruffling his hair. He pulled back, his mouth curving into a smile, and looked up at her.

"Am I interrupting something?" Dean growled.

Alex turned and saw Dean standing in the doorway, his fists clenched at his sides. He figured Sam could smooth things over, but he really needed to be the one to make sure Alex knew why he was doing what he was.

"I was trying to convince Sam that I can take care of myself, but he's just as stubborn as you are," Alex grinned as Sam stood up.

"I think I'll just, uh, yeah," he stuttered as he stepped towards the door.

"Yeah, why don't you do that?" Dean sneered as Sam pushed by him.

"Dean, what the hell's the matter with you?" Alex asked after observing his rude behavior. 

Dean slammed the door behind him and stalked forward, his face hard. "What the hell was that, Al? I came in here to talk and find you and my brother all wrapped up together?"

"It was a hug!" Alex retorted. "People need those every now and then!"

"And you were sure willing to give him one, weren't you?" Dean asked, his eyes burning with a mixture of fear and pain.

"Is that what this is about?" she asked softly as Dean turned away. Alex placed a hand on his bicep and turned him around to face her. "Dean, I will hug whoever I damn well please, but you," she said, cupping his face, "you are the only one who gets my heart."

Dean's chest heaved as he gazed down into her eyes, the emotions of the day being too much to handle, and suddenly the dam broke as he pulled her into a demanding kiss. Alex went willingly and opened her mouth after Dean's tongue swept across the seam of her lips. His hands were pressed against her back, holding her securely against his chest, and Alex released a soft moan when his hands drifted lower, gripping her ass as he ground his hips against her.

He pulled her thighs up around his waist, and Alex locked her ankles at the small of his back as Dean walked them to the bed and dropped down onto the mattress, bracing his weight on his elbows. He broke the kiss and moved down her jaw and nipped her earlobe with his teeth.

"Mine," he growled and moved to lave at her throat. 

Alex was panting as she gripped his shirt, and Dean stood long enough to strip himself of the flannel and black t-shirt before diving back in. She ran her nails gently up his back, causing Dean to shudder and kiss her firmly. She could already feel the hard line of him through his jeans, so she quickly popped the button and lowered his zipper while his tongue swept through her mouth. She caught it and sucked his tongue deeper, earning herself something between a yelp and a moan from the man above her.

Dean ran his fingertips from Alex's forehead to her jaw and pulled back to stare at her face. "Al..." he started, but trailed off when the words caught in his throat. There was so much he wanted to say, so much he wanted to tell her, but he didn't know how.

She grinned and bit her lip before pushing his jeans and underwear down over his hips and rear, and Alex wrapped her hand around his shaft. Dean's eyes shut tight as he buried his face in the curve of her neck, trying to maintain control. 

"Shh," she whispered as she used one hand to stroke him while the other rested in his hair.

Dean kissed her neck before realizing something. "You're wearing too many clothes," he murmured against her pulse point and sucked a mark into the skin there. Alex moaned, and Dean took the opportunity to lean back and pull her shirt over her head before loosening her legs from around his waist. 

She scooted back on the bed and watched while Dean licked right above the top of her jeans as he unbuttoned them. She could've died right there when he smirked up at her and stripped them off, leaving her in nothing but her underwear. 

Dean placed her right leg on his shoulder and kissed his way up to her inner thigh before repeating the process with her left leg, continuing up until she could feel his hot breath on her core.

"Dean, please," she gasped while he hooked a finger under the edge of her panties and ran his knuckle along her folds.

"Please what?" he asked, lightly caressing the soft skin from her mound to her rear.

His finger just barely dipped in to touch the juices flowing out of her and she gripped the sheets as he groaned. "Please, Dean, I need it. I need you," Alex cried out when he thrust his finger inside of her and quickly added another one.

He pumped them in and out, setting a quick pace, and Dean sucked and kissed her thigh while she moaned. He nipped the skin at the same time he twisted his hand and brushed his thumb against her clit, making her moan again. She was tightening around his fingers, and Dean knew she wouldn't last much longer, so he doubled his efforts, rubbing small circles into her clit.

He crawled over her body and studied her face as her peak neared. Alex gripped his shoulder and threw her head back, her eyes closed and lips parted, and he licked her cleavage. 

"Come for me, Al," he rumbled before biting down on a nipple through her bra.

She did, crying out his name as she fell apart underneath him, and she was vaguely aware of him removing her underwear and unhooking her bra before pulling it away as well.

"On your knees, sweetheart," he whispered in her ear before kissing her deeply again. She held his face there and bit at his lower lip before Dean flipped her over. 

Alex let out a giggle that quickly turned into a moan when Dean spread her wide and licked up from her clit to just below her tight hole. She briefly worried about how clean she was in that area before Dean's tongue thrust into her pussy.

"Oh, God, Dean!" 

He grinned against her and guided her forward until she was bracing one hand on the wall behind the headboard. Dean knelt behind her and held her to his chest while he kissed her neck. "You're mine, Al, no one else's," he murmured along her skin. Alex whimpered as one of his hands toyed with her breast while the other fell lower to her hip. He was everywhere all at once, and she was walking the line between over- and understimulation, her nerves raw and frayed from his assault on her body. "All mine," Dean growled in her ear before gripping her hip and thrusting up into her. 

"Oh fuck!" she breathed as he started pounding into her.

Dean used the arm across her chest to turn her face to his, and he kissed her, swallowing her chorus of sounds. His hips pistoned into her, the sound of skin slapping skin filling the room, and Alex now had both hands on the wall in front of her, pushing back to meet him.

"I need to hear it, Al," he murmured against her lips. "Tell me who you belong to." His fingers were rubbing her clit now, and Alex wasn't sure she could even form words at that point. Her head fell forward, and Dean kissed the back of her neck before biting down on her shoulder. 

"I'm yours, Dean," she panted out, sweat plastering her hair to her forehead. "Oh, God, I'm yours!" Her second orgasm crashed into her, and Dean kissed her lips gently before pounding into her harder.

"Al," he choked out as his own end neared. He nuzzled her neck and came with a sob, filling her up with his cum. 

His hips stilled, but he remained buried within her as long as he could while they caught their breath. He hugged her tightly and buried his face in her shoulder, ignoring the swell of emotion in his chest until he'd composed himself enough to look at her.

Alex was smiling back at him, one hand gripping his forearm, as her warm eyes danced. She stretched until he caught her lips in a searing kiss, and she sagged against his chest with a sigh. They settled back down onto the mattress, and Dean ran a hand through her dark hair as she stared at him.

"I love you, Dean," she said quietly, drawing his eyes to hers. "I love you, and that's why I'll be there tomorrow." When he started to protest, Alex cut him off with her fingertips on his lips. "We do this together or not at all. I'm not backing down here."

He furrowed his brows, every instinct he had telling him to lock her up somewhere safe, and the muscle in his jaw ticked, but he nodded once and pulled her forwards into a gentle kiss. He broke away and planted another kiss to the dark mark on her neck before wrapping Alex in his arms. 

Dean Winchester was terrified of tomorrow. It wasn't because of who they were facing though. It was because they were going into the unknown, and there was a chance he might lose the woman next to him. She snuggled into the space below his chin, and Dean tried to calm the storm rolling in his mind. She'd be there beside him tomorrow, but he'd be damned if she got hurt in the process.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Blame Google Translate for the Latin, not me.
> 
> Thanks for reading!

"No," Gabriel said firmly, his arms crossed tightly across his chest.

Alex rolled her eyes. "You don't really have a choice here, Gabe. I'm going, and that's all there is to it. Now let's get out of here."

They were standing around the large map covered table in the bunker, or at least Alex and Gabriel were standing. Sam, Dean, and Cas were still in their seats, eyes large as they watched Alex throw down with the archangel. She and Dean had just finished explaining to everyone that she would, in fact, be joining them to summon Death. Gabriel had stood abruptly, followed quickly by the woman who was now leaning towards him from across the table. 

"Alex," he warned, voice threatening. 

She braced her hands on the table and stared him down. "Wanna stay here?" Alex shrugged and laid a hand on Dean's shoulder. "Fine. Let's go, guys."

"You're bluffing," Gabriel called out as she neared the bottom of the steps.

"Wait and see," she told him as she climbed the stairs, her boots clanging on the metal. 

Gabriel turned his fury on Dean as he started to follow Alex out. "You're supposed to protect her, Dean, not lead her into battle."

Dean sighed and stared at the door Alex had just walked through. "She would've come anyway. I'd rather she be beside me than off doing something stupid. Call me crazy, but that is protecting her," he told him, arms spread wide. 

Gabriel huffed and watched them file out until the door slammed shut, before stretching his wings and flying to the Impala. He was leaning against it when Alex walked up, a smirk on her face.

"Knew you wouldn't let us go alone," she said as she wrapped her arms around his waist. 

He pulled her in with a small smile and held her close. "I couldn't do it, kiddo."

Alex pulled back, a full grin stretched across her face. "I'm glad," she told him before linking hands with Dean. 

"All right, everyone hold onto each other," Gabriel instructed, rubbing his hands together. 

"Why? What are you gonna do?" Dean asked warily. 

"He's going to transport is all to the warehouse at the same time," Cas explained, laying his hand on the shoulder that used to bare his handprint. Dean shuddered at the touch, earning him a questioning glance from Alex as Sam took her other hand. 

Dean looked down at her as Gabriel stepped forward and reached two fingers towards her forehead. He blinked as the world fell away, and opened his eyes again to see her sway a bit when the ground changed from gravel to concrete.

"Got everything we need?" Sam asked Cas as he began drawing the sigil on the ground. 

"Fulgarite is not as difficult to obtain as you both made it sound years ago," the angel commented while mixing the ingredients. 

Dean rolled his eyes and grinned down at Alex before kissing her temple and walking towards the others. "Yeah, Cas, we figured that out a while back."

Castiel narrowed his eyes at them. "Then why did you feel the need to tie up that wealthy couple?"

Sam stood and ran a hand over his hair. "No, that was--you know what? Nevermind. Let's just get this over with."

Alex watched from her spot beside Gabriel while they prepared everything for the ritual, and the archangel handed her a short sword. "Here," he said. "Hold onto this and don't let go, okay?"

"What is it?" she asked, running her hand along the smooth blade and adjusting her grip on the handle.

"Archangel's blade," he said quietly. "I don't know if it'll kill her, but it'll sure slow her down."

"Is this yours?" Alex hissed, looking over at him.

Gabriel shook his head. "I picked it up when Raphael died, figured it might come in handy to have two." He dropped a blade down from his sleeve and wrapped his other arm around her. "I gotcha, kiddo. Don't freak out of this goes south and you wake up on a beach somewhere, okay?"

"What--"

He raised a brow at her. "I agreed to you coming, but I never said I'd let you stay."

"Asshole," Alex muttered.

"You ready, Al?" Dean asked as he joined them.

"As I'll ever be," she grinned.

Dean took Gabriel's spot and nodded to Sam and Cas, who each had a blade out as well. Sam turned to the sigil and sliced into his palm, dropping the blood into the bowl, before chanting. 

"Nos si vocare te, o mors. Apparent nobis ad istam summam in circulum."

The candles flared and went out, and Sam stood, his blade ready at his side. They all looked around for Billie, except for Gabriel, who was staring hard at the place between himself and Castiel. 

"She's coming," he smirked as he moved to shield Alex with his body.

The old warehouse trembled around them, groaning and cracking as the ground shook beneath their feet. Alex gripped Dean's hand as her heart pounded, but a gentle squeeze from him had her looking up. He smiled softly down at her until the ground suddenly stopped.

"Hello, boys," Billie said after appearing directly beside Gabriel. "Alex." 

Gabriel faced her. "Nice promotion," he stated with a nod.

Billie lifted a shoulder and crossed her arms. "It's okay, lots of paperwork though. What's the occasion?"

"What do you know of Michael trying to access this universe?" Castiel demanded.

"I know he's not coming to play," Billie answered as she tracked his movements with her eyes.

"We need to know whose side you're on," Sam boomed out. "If he shows, can we count on you to help like you did with the Darkness, or are you going to be bound to him?"

"I am bound," she said slowly, "to no one."

Alex pulled away from Dean and walked towards Billie, despite Dean's incessant pleading for her to stop. Gabriel's arm shot out in front of her, his iron limb holding her back. "How did you find out who I really am?"

Billie smiled and glanced at Dean before locking eyes with Alex once more. "Because," she said lowly, "I know how you die. Ask Dean, he's seen my library. I know how each one of you dies, except...you," she said, her gaze falling on Castiel. "You're not welcome in the Empty anymore, I hear, so where will you go if you die?" Castiel swallowed as she scrutinized him. "It's interesting for sure."

"But how does Alex's death tell you who she is?" Gabriel asked.

Billie smirked and looked pointedly down at his shirt. "That's involved. Otherwise, I never would have known, but that, that gave it away."

"So will you help us stop Michael?" Dean asked, moving up behind Alex. 

"I will, but let me tell you, you don't have enough firepower here to take him on. The best way is to combine Alex's power with Jack's. Two kids of archangels? Should make it easy."

"Any other options?" Alex asked with trepidation. Her stomach churned with the idea of taking on her grace and becoming something else.

"You could always fight fire with fire," Billie said, "but our Michael would need a vessel to use once he left the cage. What do you say, Dean? You're the only one who can hold him in a battle like that. No one else would even come close to winning. Their bodies would wear out too quickly because they aren't made for him like you are."

Dean inhaled sharply. His life or Alex's? No question there, but his freedom is all he'd ever had. He looked at Sam who shook his head sharply. 

"No, Dean. We'll find another way. There's always another way. You don't have to do this."

Dean took a deep breath and turned Alex to face him. "Dean, what are they talking about?" she asked as she searched his face.

"The forms that you see Cas and Gabriel in, those were once people who gave them permission to use their bodies. If," he closed his eyes and rubbed Alex's arms, "if I agree to be Michael's vessel, he would be in control of my body while I sat in the backseat." 

Dean opened his eyes to stare down at her when she put a hand to his face. "No," Alex whispered. She turned back to Billie. "I'll do it," she said, her voice strong. Then, to her dad, "Give me my grace, I want it back."

Billie raised an eyebrow while Dean shoved Gabriel away. "No way! Billie said your grace is involved with your death. No way are you getting your hands on it."

"Dean, it's either that or you become a vessel. I might die if I get my grace back, but you definitely will if you go through with this!"

"We'd still need Jack for your plan to work, and we don't even know where he is!"

"So we find him! We've got time!"

"Open the cage, Billie. I'm ready."

"Is that a yes?" Billie asked.

"No!" Sam and Alex shouted at her.

Dean squared his shoulders. "Ye--" He slumped to the ground revealing Castiel standing behind him. The angel leveled a challenging glare at Billie.

"I'd say that's a no," Gabriel told the former reaper. "Thanks for the tip, though."

"You people have no idea what you're up against," Billie spit. "You glimpsed a small portion of what that other Michael is capable of, but I've seen it all."

"We'll beat him some other way," Sam told her as he stooped to sling his brother's arm over his shoulder. He hefted Dean up with a groan, and Cas slipped under the hunter's other arm, taking on most of the weight.

"Thank you for coming, Billie, really," Alex told her. "You've given us a lot to think about."

"Remember what I told you, Alex."

"I know," she said quickly. "I remember." Billie nodded and disappeared. Alex started cleaning up and gathering their gear. Gabriel held a duffel bag open for her to dump their stuff into, and she smiled even though she felt like crying. "Get Dean home. You can come back for me."

Gabriel stood, and Alex waited until she heard the flap of wings in the air before she allowed a tear to escape her eyes. She didn't know how it came down to this. Why couldn't God just let her be happy? Why was it always something wanting to shatter her piece of normal? The wings sounded again, and she hastily tried to wipe away the evidence of her crying before Gabriel saw. 

"You did good, kiddo," he told her, crouching down to help with the clean-up. He frowned when he saw her face and snapped his fingers, erasing any trace that they'd been there, before pulling her into a hug. "You're stronger than you give yourself credit for. Not a lot of people would go toe to toe with Death like that, and you're right. Dean doesn't need to take on Michael. My brother's spent too long in the cage, and he isn't right in the head. There's no telling what he'd do if he got topside."

Gabriel stood and helped Alex to her feet before removing his necklace and placing it on his daughter. "You don't have to take it now, but no one needs to know you have it either. Wait until the time is right to use your grace. You'll be okay til then." 

"Thank you," Alex whispered and threw her arms around him. He pressed his cheek to her dark hair and held her tight before whisking them both back to the bunker.


	9. Chapter 9

Alex was sitting against Dean's headboard with the hunter resting between her legs. He was still out cold when Gabe brought her back, and she insisted on staying with him til he woke up. She had a lot to think about anyway, so she'd put on one of his old records and settled in behind him while he slept. 

Her fingers carded through Dean's short hair as she fiddled with the glowing vial at her neck. She now had her wedding rings nestled on the silver chain with her grace, and it struck her how odd it was to have so many pieces of her life literally tied together. What would Jack think if her could see her now? Would he be freaked out by the angel thing, or would he accept her for all that she was? Would he applaud her new career, or would he tell her to go home where she could be safe? 

Alex's eyebrows pulled together as she considered it. He could probably understand the hunting, the man was a cop after all, but the grace? She wasn't certain Jack would be able to get past that, especially if she actually used it. Her frown deepened as she ran her thumb along the smooth edge of his wedding band. She didn't know what he'd say, and that scared her. It was like she was losing touch with who she'd been just a few short months ago. What would any of her family or friends say if they could see her now?

Alex swallowed down the bile that was threatening to come up. They wouldn't understand any of it because they hadn't lived it, but no matter how many times Alex told herself that, she couldn't get the image of their judgemental faces out of her mind. It's like their ghosts were haunting her thoughts, telling her to go home. 

The people here, they didn't need her. They probably didn't even want her around. She was just a loose end that refused to be tied up, and they didn't know a nice way to tell her to leave. Even Dean probably only wanted her because she was an easy lay, a whore, just like that vampire had said. Gabriel didn't have anything to do with her until recently, so how much could he possibly care about what happened to her? Maybe she was just a tool, a way to end their battle. After it was over, they'd get rid of her for sure.

Alex's breathing picked up, and she grasped the glowing vial in her hand. Shit. She knew what was coming next. It'd been years since she'd had a panic attack, and she thought that surely after all she'd been through she was done having them, but the signs were there. The pounding heart, the sweat on her neck, the ringing in her ears, they all meant that she had less than a minute to get control of her emotions before she freaked out.

Alex frantically looked around the room as her breaths turned to gasps. She needed to focus on one thing, anything, but nothing was holding her attention. 

Shit, shit, shit!

Alex shoved Dean off of her lap and practically fell out of bed as she scrambled to the corner and curled in on herself. The tears were flowing freely now, and she wasn't sure if she could take much more before she passed out.

"Al?" Dean was slowly starting to sit up, the heel of his hand pressed to his forehead, when he heard the sound of someone's rapid breathing. He quickly recognized the room he was in as his own, and his eyes widened when he saw the woman in the corner. "Al!"

He raced over to where she sat and hit his knees beside her. "Are you hurt? What's going on?" he asked as he scoured her body for injuries. Dean framed Alex's face with his hands and made her look up at him. 

Jesus.

Her usually bright eyes were red rimmed and her skin was a ghostly shade of white as she sucked in a ragged breath. He just barely registered the new addition to her necklace before he noticed the rapid rise and fall of her chest. She needed to calm down before she hyperventilated. 

"Al? Hey, hey, look at me," Dean ordered as he pried one of her hands from around her knees and held it on his chest. "You've gotta calm down, okay? Slow your breathing. Try and match it with mine. In and out, babe. Just like me." 

Alex squeezed her eyes shut and shook her head as the voices continued in her mind. He didn't need her, here. Just look at how crazy she was being. Why the hell would he want her around? 

"Alex!" Dean barked, and her eyes snapped open. "I'm right here," he said. "Breathe, Al. Breathe."

Looking at his beautiful face was too much for her, so Alex stared at where his big hand covered hers instead. She focused on the warmth radiating from his body, and the way his calloused hand felt on her skin. She felt the rise and fall of his chest, and his words became clearer as the ringing in her ears subsided. 

Dean ducked his head to look at her face when it looked like Alex had a handle on her breathing. "Hey," he asked softly, drawing her gaze back to meet his. "What was that?"

Alex wiped her eyes with her hands and sniffles once. "Sorry," she muttered. "I, ugh, panic attack."

"Don't be sorry for something like that, Al. It happens. I just, I don't know why it happened."

Alex pinched the bridge of her nose and waved a hand at her head. "It was me," she half-explained. "I got too deep in my own head, and just freaked out."

Dean sat down and pulled her into his lap before kissing her forehead. "You shouldn't let yourself do that. It's dangerous. What if I hadn't woken up?"

Alex shrugged. "I would've passed out." Dean's body tensed around her. "It's happened before, just been a while," she told him as she pressed her face into the soft flannel of his shirt. He was always so incredibly warm, and she wanted to bury herself in his arms forever. 

Dean folded his legs underneath him and scooped Alex up before standing and laid her on the bed. "You can't let it get that bad, Al," he told her as he stripped off his shirts and jeans.

Dear Lord, Alex thought as she stared at him. She didn't know what he was doing, but she sure as hell wasn't about to stop him.

He unbuttoned her pants and gripped the waistband as he stared at her. Alex lifted her hips and let Dean pull them down, his hands skimming her legs the whole way. He kissed the inside of each of her knees as he moved up between her legs, hovering over her. They stared at each other for a few seconds before Dean slipped his hands behind Alex's back and pulled her until she was straddling his lap in the bed.

His expression was surprisingly tender as he stared up at her, and Alex felt his hands come to rest just under the hem of her shirt. She not her lip and raised her arms as he pulled it up over her head before wrapping his arms around her and peppering her chest and neck with kisses.

"I've gotta know why," he murmured against her skin. "What was it that made you go into a tailspin like that?" Alex ran her hands from his broad shoulders up to his neck, and he pulled back to look at her. "Tell me the truth, Al. Whatever it is, I promise it's okay."

She couldn't look him in the eye without crying, so she brushed a piece of hair away from his face as she spoke. "I'm scared you don't really want me," Alex whispered. "I'm scared that after all this is over, you'll leave, and I'll be on my own again." Her eyes fluttered shut as he kissed a line under her jaw up to her ear.

"I'm not going anywhere, Al," he told her, voice rough, as he squeezed her tight.

"I wish I could believe that."

Dean stopped and sighed before burying his face in her neck. He'd make her believe him one day. He'd have to. Dean rocked forward and used one hand to catch himself while the other gently lowered Alex to the bed. He ran his thumb along her lower lip and kissed her slowly, savoring the way she tasted and the feel of her hands on his back as she pulled him closer. 

He backed away and rolled over beside her before pulling her close and getting that good skin to skin contact wherever he could. He'd read somewhere one time that emotionally distressed people benefit from personal contact. Dean didn't know if it was true or not, but he figured it was worth a try, and it made him feel better after the day they'd had so surely it was helping Alex, too.

"I love you, Dean," Alex said quietly. 

He sighed and ran his hand up and down her back. "I love you, too, Al. I just wish you could see it."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shorter chapter, I know but good things are coming in the next one.
> 
> Thanks for reading!


	10. Chapter 10

Dean extricated himself from around Alex the next morning. It didn't seem as though they had moved an inch after falling asleep. If anything, they'd gotten closer. He'd woken in a tangle of limbs, his legs slotted with hers and her arm slung over his waist and pressing into his lower back. He hated to leave her there, and Dean could've sworn he felt a physical tug in his chest when he stood staring down at Alex's body from the edge of the bed, but nature called, and he was pretty sure Sam or Cas was waiting for him in the kitchen or library to discuss what almost happened the previous day.

Sure enough, after Dean had relieved himself and stumbled into the kitchen for coffee, Cas was sitting at the small breakfast table, his hands folded in front of him. Dean felt the angel's eyes boring into the back of his skull as he poured himself a fresh cup of black gold. A part of him suspected Cas had been waiting for Dean to wake up and made the coffee in preparation for the heart to heart that was sure to follow. 

"Mornin', Cas," Dean grunted after taking a sip and settling in across from his best friend. 

"Good morning, Dean. I take it you slept well?"

He couldn't help the grin that tugged at his lips and tried to hide the smile behind his cup. "Yeah, man," Dean said, eyes flitting up to look at Cas before staring back down at the dark liquid. "It was nice."

Castiel nodded. "And Alex?"

"Out like a light. She went through a lot yesterday."

"So did you, Dean," Cas said seriously. 

Ah, there it is, Dean thought bitterly. He set the cup down on the table and settled his gaze on the angel in front of him. "I'm not sorry."

Castiel's jaw clenched with barely restrained rage. "You cannot become Michael's vessel, Dean. You'd never come back from that experience, and he would wreak unknown havoc on this world." He shook his head and shifted his weight onto his forearms. "You know, it's sad that we have to have this conversation again. I thought after last time you would never do something as stupid as that again. You saw what happened to Sam. Do you think Michael is going to just go back to Heaven when it's all over? He's been in the cage for centuries, Dean! All because of you and your brother," he finished quietly. 

"I couldn't let her die," Dean mumbled as he spun his cup on the table.

Castiel's face softened, and he placed a hand on the hunter's forearm, causing Dean to meet his eyes. "We can't let you die either."

Dean swallowed and got up to refill his cup. "Turns out I don't have to take on Michael anyway," he said over his shoulder, "seeing as how Al is carrying her grace around now." He turned back around and caught the angel's questioning stare. "I take it you weren't hip to that, huh? I don't know when she got it, but it was there when I woke up yesterday so I figured Gabriel gave it to her sometime after I got knocked out."

"Does she intend to use it soon?"

Dean shrugged and leaned back against the wall before taking a sip of coffee. "I dunno, man. We haven't discussed it yet."

Cas nodded and mulled it over. "Perhaps it would be best to wait until we know for sure she'll need the power. When we get Jack back they both will need training. As long as it's in a safe place, I see no need for her to take it on so soon."

"I'd rather she not have to at all if we can help it," Dean muttered. 

"We'll research other ways to beat Michael," Cas assured him, "but you should prepare yourself in case we do need Alex to be at full power. It may be the only way."

Dean pursed his lips and avoided his friend's face by glancing around the room. He'd find another way, he had to. His eyes landed on a serving tray in the corner, and an idea struck him.

"Hey Cas?" he asked.

"Yes, Dean?"

He smirked and strode towards the refrigerator. "How do you feel about learning to cook breakfast?"  
_____________

"Al?" Dean whispered as he set the tray on his bedside table.

"Mhmm."

"Time to wake up, babe." He bent over and smoothed Alex's dark hair away from her face before kissing her temple.

"Coffee?" she mumbled into the pillow. 

Dean grinned and sat on the edge of the bed. "If you get up there will be, but if not I'm gonna drink it all myself."

"M'up."

"All the way, Al."

She groaned and threw Dean a glare over her shoulder, but Alex eventually pushed herself up into a sitting position. She raised an eyebrow at the man in front of her and held a hand out. He chuckled and placed her favorite red mug, full of hot coffee, in her hand, earning himself a bright smile in return. 

"Oh my God," Alex moaned after taking a sip. "That's good. You're forgiven."

"For everything?" Dean asked, hoping he could avoid another awkward discussion. "Because I made breakfast if you're still on the fence."

She sobered and eyed the tray of food. "I think the food should wait until after we talk." 

"Pancakes aren't good cold, you know."

"Dean," Alex snapped.

He held up a hand and shook his head. "Cas already beat you to the punch, okay?" Dean sucked in a breath and turned to gaze at her. "At the time, I thought I was doing the right thing. You were wanting to take on your grace, but Billie had just told us that you could die because of it, so I was feeling pressured to act. I know I should have waited and talked through all of our options before making a decision like that, but," he wiped a hand down his face before taking one of Alex's hands, "I thought I was about to lose you. I don't know. I guess I just acted on instinct."

Alex tilted her head to the side as her eyes watered. "Your first instinct is to sacrifice yourself?" 

"Guess so," Dean told her with a grim smile.

Alex put her coffee on the tray before kneeling on the bed and wrapping her arms around Dean's broad shoulders. "Don't you know how amazing you are?" she whispered as she ran a hand through his hair. Dean huffed, and Alex cupped his face so she could look him in the eye. "You're a hero, Dean. You save people all the time, and you never get paid or any kind of recognition for it, and yet you still do it. Every single day. You're worth more than just a sacrifice, a, a soldier of some kind. You deserve the world."

He stared at her, his eyes swirling with emotion, and she could practically see the gears turning in his head, so Alex did the only thing she could think of at the moment.

She kissed him. Hard.

The force of her kiss threw Dean off balance, and before he could blink, Alex was straddling his waist, her tongue sweeping into his mouth and tasting the coffee he'd already had that morning. She broke away when he groaned against her mouth, and she moved down to press open mouthed kisses to his jaw and neck.

"Let go of the world, Dean," she whispered as her lips grazed his ear. "Let go of the responsibility and the fear and let your mind go quiet. Just feel the moment for once," she told him, accenting the last part with a grind of her hips.

She pushed herself down his body and hitched his shirt up to his chest before lavishing the toned muscles with her lips. He was breathing faster with every inch she got closer to his waist, and Dean jerked his shirt off as soon as she dipped her hand below the band of his sweats.

Alex grinned up at him and slid off the bed to tug his pants down over the hard erection that had already tented them. She bit her lip as her eyes raked over his body. Even nearing his fortieth birthday, Dean was still a very fine man. She studied him closely, the way he was stretched out across the mattress, his arms thrown up over his head and his eyes staring half-lidded up at her, and she couldn't believe how she'd ended up with him. She was average at best, but he was magnificent. 

"Al," Dean called in a gravelly voice, snapping her attention back down to his cock. It was standing tall and twitched slightly when she licked her lips. 

It was the only invitation she needed.

Alex quickly shed her bra and panties and climbed back over Dean before taking him in her mouth. She lowered her lips until she felt him nudge the back of her throat, and then she rose up, sucking hard, and released the head of his penis with a quiet pop. She wrapped a hand around the base and placed her other hand on his hip when he bucked up into her grasp, a sigh escaping his mouth.

"I've got you, Dean." Alex licked up the length of him before wrapping her lips around him and bobbing her head a few times while using her hand as an extension of her mouth. She looked up and saw Dean's head thrown back against the mattress, his jaw clenched tight, and he moaned as she flicked her tongue over his slit.

"Jesus," he hissed when Alex cupped his balls and applied gentle pressure to his perineum while she took him all the way in. "You're gonna have to slow down or climb on top, Al, because I won't last too long at this rate."

Alex slid down his shaft one more time before pulling off and grinning proudly up at him.

"Show off," he panted before eyeing the vial hanging from her neck. The grace was swirling hypnotically inside casting a golden glow on Alex's features. It was beautiful, suiting her unlike any other color he'd seen her wear, and something about the image of her face, pink lips slick with spit and hovering inches above his cock while her dark eyes danced in the light, made him want to hold her close and never let go.

Alex slid her body forwards, dragging her skin sensuously against his own, until she was once more straddling his hips, his cock nestled in her slick folds. She dipped down to kiss him deeply before pressing her hands against his chest for leverage. Dean grinned and gripped her hips to raise her up just enough to place his head inside her. Alex sank down slowly, a long, drawn out moan tumbling from her lips, and Dean prayed he could last long enough to let her finish first.

She tilted back and let her eyes fall closed as she rose again. "Just feel, Dean," Alex murmured before falling down quickly with a gasp. She rocked above him, moving like a goddess with every roll of her hips.

Dean reached down between them and started rubbing small circles into her clit, but Alex gripped his wrist and held it down beside his head. "You don't have to do anything but lay there and enjoy yourself, honey," she grinned before using her own hand to push herself over the edge. She came apart, convulsing around him and falling forwards onto her elbows. 

Dean wrapped his arms around Alex's waist and used her new position to thrust his hips up into her as she rode out her orgasm. She buried her face in the crook of his neck and gripped his shoulders while he moved. He came quickly, finishing with a grunt that would make Alex think back to this moment whenever Dean would grunt doing other things like work on his car or fight off the monster of the week. 

They lay there panting while he ran his hand up and down her sweat slicked back. "I could get used to sharing my bed with you," Dean murmured against Alex's cheek as his heart slowed. He didn't know why he said it out loud, but it had been running through his mind ever since he woke up curled around her that morning. 

Alex propped up on an elbow and stared at him with a guarded expression, and for a moment Dean thought he'd overstepped his bounds, pushed too far too fast, but then she smiled softly and pressed a gentle kiss to his lips before rolling off him and standing by the bed. "Should I move my junk in here then?" she asked with a quirk of her eyebrow as she walked backwards to the bathroom. 

"If that's what you want," Dean called while adjusting a pillow under his head so he could watch her move in the reflection of the mirror.

She walked back to the bed and started pulling on her t-shirt and underwear. "You're serious, aren't you?"

"I wouldn't have mentioned it otherwise."

Alex blinked and pushed her hair back. "Dean, I, I think we should wait before taking that step. I mean, that's a pretty big move."

"We travel together all the time anyway. I don't see how it's any different."

She peered up at his hurt expression before sitting on the mattress beside his hip. "This makes it official, though. I love waking up with you, and I love spending so much time together, but Dean, I still need a little space. I know I just rolled out of your bed, but things have already moved really fast between us. I think we should slow down a bit and take some time to actually date each other."

Dean laced their fingers together and ran his thumb across Alex's knuckles. "I hate it when you're right," he grumbled before sighing. "I can't believe I haven't taken you on a real date yet."

"We've been a little busy with other things," she smiled. 

He shot her a boyish grin. "Are you busy tonight?"

"I'm surprisingly free," she answered. 

Dean hummed and pulled her onto his chest before pushing her hair behind her ear. "Wanna go out with me?"

Alex giggled. "I would love to go out with you, Dean Winchester."

He pressed a kiss to her lips. 

"Be ready at eight."


	11. Chapter 11

Alex eyed herself in the bathroom mirror as she tried again to get her hair to cooperate. "Damn thing," she muttered before angrily pulling the pins loose and dropping them into her makeup bag. A date had seemed like a good idea that morning, but as the day wore on and Alex began getting ready, her nerves started wearing on her.

"You're a fool, Wade," she whispered at her reflection. "You're a damned fool. That man's too good for you, and once he sees what a mess you are he'll be running for the hills." 

She sighed and sprayed her hair before wiping a smudge of mascara out from under her lower lashes. Standing straight, Alex took one last look at herself. She didn't bring much in the way of fashionable clothing, but she did have a pair of dark skinny jeans that she paired with her FBI heels and a longer black t-shirt that hugged her curves. The shirt's scoop neck dipped down just below her necklace, and the vial cast its golden glow on her chest. Her hair was loose, softly waving to midway down her back, and okay, so maybe it didn't look terrible, but she still pressed her lips into a thin line at the image before her. 

It wasn't perfect, but it was the best she could do with what she had.

Alex walked out into her room and saw Gabriel perched on the edge of her bed, her photo album spread across his lap. He flashed her a grin as she sat down next to him before flipping the page. "Hey, kiddo. All set for your big date?"

"If only," Alex sighed looking at the pictures in front of her. 

Gabriel furrowed his brows as he stared at her. "Troubles?" he asked.

"Just nervous," she admitted with what she hoped was a reassuring smile. "It's been a while since I last went out with a man."

"I think it's safe to say Dean already likes you, kid, so the hard part's over with."

Alex hummed before pointing to a picture of her daughter on a swing set. "That's A.J. just after she turned two," she explained. "I'd taken the day off, so we picked up lunch and met Jack at the park."

Gabriel watched Alex's face and chose his next words carefully. "She looks like she was a happy kid." Sure enough, Alex's features faltered slightly before her mask slipped back into place.

"Why are you here, Gabe?"

"Well, I got to thinking." He paused as Alex raised an eyebrow at him. "If you're gonna be wearing your grace out and about, then it needs to be hidden a little better." Gabriel held a hand out, and Alex removed the chain from her neck.

"What are you going to do with it?" she asked as he closed his fist around the vial and two rings. He wiggled his eyebrows and grinned before opening his hand again. 

Alex gasped as she looked at the small glass ornament that had replaced the vial. She turned it over in her hands as she examined it. Gabriel had molded the vial into an orb with strands of the white and yellow gold from her and her husband's wedding rings running through the glass. Her grace still swirled within the orb, but it didn't stand out as much behind the gold of her rings.

She looked up to Gabriel as her eyes started to water, and he smiled before tentatively reaching out and squeezing her hand. "Don't mess up your make-up, kiddo," he told her quietly. "I don't need Dean Winchester on my ass because I made you cry."

Alex huffed a small laugh. "Thanks, Gabe," she told him. "Really." She smiled as she thought of how perfect it was. Sure it was functional, but it also gave her a way to carry a piece of her marriage wherever she went without it being painfully obvious. 

Gabriel closed the photo album and set it to the side before standing, pulling Alex with him as he went. "Well," he said as he place a hand on each of the young woman's shoulders, "you look good, and I know I look good, so I'm gonna go put the fear of Dad into your boyfriend before he sees you."

"That sounds so weird," she laughed, and honest smile gracing her face.

"I prefer the term quirky," Gabriel grinned before disappearing. 

Alex smoothed her shirt down and double checked her eyeliner in the mirror while grabbing her purse from the bathroom counter. "You can do this," she told herself as she tucked her pistol in her bag. She threw the strap over her shoulder and grabbed her black leather jacket and walked out, afraid that if she stayed any longer she'd lose her nerve and back out of the date.

Her heels clicked loudly on the concrete floor of the hallway as she made her way towards the library. When she rounded the corner, Alex had to stifle a laugh at the scene in front of her.

Gabriel was standing toe to toe with Dean looking for all the world like the fierce archangel he was while he pointed a finger up at the hunter's face. Dean was glaring down at Gabriel with his jaw clenched, and Alex could've sworn she saw his hand twitch towards his gun. She just barely caught the words "into a Volkswagen Beetle" when Sam cleared his throat and Gabriel and Dean's heads whipped around to where Sam was stretched out in one of the chairs at the table.

"We've got company, guys," he smirked and nodded over to where Alex stood.

Gabriel grinned proudly, but Alex only had eyes for Dean. 

He swallowed hard as his eyes raked over her body, and Dean let out his breath in a huff like someone had punched him in the gut before recovering and rounding the table to get to her.

"You look great," Dean told her when he got closer.

"You don't look so bad yourself, handsome," she quipped. Dean had showered and shaved, and Alex caught a faint whiff of cologne when he adjusted the collar of the red flannel he wore. He took her jacket and held it out so she could thread her arms through the sleeves before grabbing his jacket and pulling it on as well. 

"You ready to go?" Dean asked, taking her hand. 

Alex nodded and they headed up the stairs as Sam called out, "Make good choices!" Alex and Dean heard Sam and Gabriel laughing behind them so Dean flipped the two the bird over his shoulder before holding open the door for Alex.

"So what's the plan?" Alex questioned as she slid into Baby's front seat.

"Do you like barbecue?"

She snorted and grinned at him. "Dude, I'm from Tennessee. I was eating barbecue before I could walk."

Dean shook his head at her antics as he shut her door and leaned down so he could speak through her open window. "There's this little hole in the wall bar just outside of town. Best barbecue this side of the Mississippi," he smirked before walking around the car and getting in.

Alex slid over to the middle of the seat. "That's quite the statement. It'd better live up to the hype."

"Trust me, Al," he said as he started Baby's motor. "I've eaten at just about every little diner and bar in America. This place definitely lives up to the hype."

"Well I guess I can trust your judgement. What are you feeling for music?"

Dean watched her dig through his box of tapes before one caught his eye. He snatched it and popped it in before adjusting the volume. A gentle strumming filled the car, and Alex smiled up at the man next to her as Bob Seger began singing "Turn the Page."

"This good?" Dean asked while resting his arm over her shoulders and tucking her into his side.

"It's perfect," she murmured. 

Dean kissed the top of Alex's head and checked his mirrors once before pulling out of the dirt drive and onto the highway.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short chapter, but I had to split it up, otherwise it was going to run too long.


	12. Chapter 12

Dean parked Baby at the edge of the gravel lot and quickly rounded the car to open Alex's door for her, a bright smile on his face. They'd discussed their individual tastes in music on the way to the bar, and although he didn't agree with her love of variety, he'd managed to surprise her when he mentioned a couple of Taylor Swift songs he enjoyed. 

"I just don't believe it," Alex was saying as she stood. "There's no way that you, this he-man hunter with decades of old rock in his car actually listens to Taylor friggin Swift."

"Believe it, Al," Dean told her as he placed a warm hand on her lower back and led her to the front door.

She stopped under the neon lights and gawked at him. "But how the heck did you even get introduced to her in the first place?"

"There was a, uh, an incident," he laughed while rubbing the back of his neck.

"Isn't there always?"

Dean flashed her a cocky grin and winked before continuing. "It was a run in with a couple of witches, a Hansel and Gretel type deal."

"They were killing kids?" Alex asked, her eyes widening. 

"Kinda," Dean admitted, "but they were turning adults that no one would miss into kids and then killing them."

It dawned on Alex where this story was heading, and she gripped his forearm. "Oh, Dean, you didn't."

"I didn't get turned on purpose," he told her. "I had been talking to this woman at a bar, and I heard her scream when I walked outside. I ran to help her and poof! Next thing I know, I'm waking up in a basement with pimples and a dick that didn't know what to do with itself."

"How'd you break the spell?"

"I escaped and took a bus back to the motel Sammy and I had been staying in, and that's when I first heard Taylor Swift on the radio. We went back to the house and killed the witch and Hansel, and I was able to use the hex bag, but it got destroyed before that chic could get turned back." Dean smiled as he thought of the woman and how much they'd had in common. "She was surprisingly okay with staying a kid. She said it was like a fresh start."

"That's insane," Alex mumbled. She was starting to wonder if anything was impossible anymore. 

"You know," Dean said as he led Alex into the building, "I almost stayed that way myself. I was dealing with the Mark at the time, but when I got turned, it disappeared. I figured of I stayed a kid the Mark wouldn't return, but then Sam reminded me that I couldn't drink, or drive, or pose as FBI, so I changed my mind pretty quick."

They were met by a thin veil of smoke and the sound of a jukebox playing ACDC from somewhere in the room when they entered the main room, and Dean grinned over his shoulder before taking Alex's hand and weaving a path between the tables and the few people on the scarred old dance floor to a booth in the back. Dean seemed totally relaxed and at ease here, and Alex knew he was always ready to confront any kind of threat, but it was nice to see his face so light and seemingly carefree.

A cute blonde sauntered up to their table and tucked her hair behind her ear as she smiled at Dean. "Hi there. Can I get you a drink?" she asked him.

He raised his brows at Alex, and she spoke up first. "Four Roses on the rocks for me." The waitress barely glanced her way before returning to Dean.

"A shot of tequila and a bottle of El Sol, and I think we're both gonna order the barbecue sandwiches, right Al?" Dean checked. God, he thought, I hope I'm not coming off as too controlling. She nodded, so he took that as a good sign. "Can I get a side of chips to share and coleslaw, too?"

"Sure thing, hon," the waitress winked before turning on her heel.

"She was sure into you," Alex remarked with a tilt of her head in the waitress' direction. 

Dean glanced over at where the waitress was putting a couple of drinks on her tray before shaking his head. "She tries to flirt when I come here, but I usually try to keep it reigned in. I try not to hook up with women in my usual hangouts this close to home. I'm not interested in her tonight anyway," he said pointedly. 

"And who are you interested in, Dean?" she asked as she narrowed her eyes playfully. 

He was about to answer when the waitress came back with their drinks. "Do you need anything else while I'm here?"

"I think we're good for now," Dean told her while looking at Alex. "Thanks." She seemed to get the message that he wasn't interested and turned away without a word. "I'm only interested in the woman in front of me," he said as he held Alex's gaze. 

She felt her face starting to flush and took a sip of her drink to cover, relishing the burn in her throat. Dean did his tequila shot while continuing his staring contest, and a slow smile spread across Alex's face when he chased the shot with his beer and reached across the table. She took his hand and hummed as Dean's thumb brushed over her knuckles. 

"You're quite the charmer, Mr. Winchester."

"I've been told."

Alex glanced down at their hands intertwined on the tabletop. "What do you do for you, Dean?" she asked.

He furrowed his brows as she looked up. "What do you mean?"

"When you have some time off, and the world isn't about to end, what's something you do just because you enjoy it?"

Dean sat there a minute, his green eyes searching Alex's face, before speaking. "I get in my car, turn the radio up, and just drive. I know that sounds crazy because we spend so much time driving already, but when it's just me and my music and the road?" He shook his head lightly. "I don't know. There's just this peace that comes over me. The world gets quiet, and I just go."

"You should do that more often then," she said quietly. 

"I can't," Dean said while he wiped a hand down his face. He sat back in the booth as their waitress silently dropped off their food and walked away. They tucked into their sandwiches, Alex groaning as she tasted the meat, and Dean grinned as much as he could with his cheeks full of food. "Good?"

"Great," she agreed while wiping away some sauce with a finger. She sucked it off quickly, and Dean shifted in his seat. Watching her eat was going to be the death of him.

He finished the sandwich and took a pull of his beer while he waited for her to catch up. "Son of a bitch," Dean breathed when Alex's eyes closed and she licked her lips. "So, uh, what do you do?" he choked out when she finished. 

Alex sipped her bourbon as she mulled it over. "Nothing," she admitted. "I mean, I used to be so busy with running the store, and taking care of A.J. and Jack that I didn't really have time for a whole lot. We barely even went out as a couple because we were just too tired when the weekend rolled around. It was mostly just movies on the couch after supper, but it was nice. We didn't need anything else to be happy, and things have been insane the last couple of months, so I haven't really done anything for myself besides shower or have a cup of coffee." Alex's eyes went dark, and she pushed her hair back as she exhaled. "I'm still kinda lost, you know?"

He nodded but otherwise stayed silent as the song changed and "Wonderful Tonight" started playing. Dean wanted to reach out and hold the woman in front of him, and he mentally cursed the table between them. He was never sure what to say when she brought up her old life, especially her deceased husband, so he tried to show support in other ways. Alex began drumming her fingers in time to the music on the table top, and she stared out at the scattered couples on the dance floor. 

"You wanna dance?" Dean asked, putting some cash on the table.

A soft smile graced her lips and she nodded once. "Sure," she told him. 

Dean stood and held out his hand as he fought to push down the butterflies in his stomach. He hadn't danced with a woman in a while, but he was determined to show her a good time. Alex took his hand and stood before tossing back the rest of her drink. Dean raised an eyebrow in question at her, but Alex just grinned back. She could handle one drink.

He let her lead him onto the floor, but he pulled her close and placed a hand on her back to keep her there as they rocked back and forth. Alex blinked up at him, and suddenly she looked so vulnerable and afraid. Dean swallowed and tried to concentrate on his feet, but her expression was making it hard to breathe. He wanted to put her at ease, make her forget she'd ever been hurt, but he didn't know how. Instead he just stroked his thumb on her back.

Alex was freaking out internally as she stared into the man's eyes. He was stunning, anyone could see that, but there was so much more to Dean than most people thought. He had a huge heart and had suffered and sacrificed for other people his whole life, and Alex wanted to take care of him, make him realize how special he was, but she wasn't sure he'd let her. So, she gently laid her head on his chest and listened to the steady beat of his heart.

The song ended, and something more upbeat started playing, but the two were too caught up in holding each other to care. Alex was the first to lean back, and Dean's tender expression made her stomach do a flip. He slowly closed the distance between them like he was afraid she'd disappear if he moved too quickly, and their eyes shut right before their lips met. There was so much said in that moment. Fear, anger, pain, hope, and love passed between them without a word. When they parted, Dean rested his forehead against hers as Alex bit her lip, and his eyes opened to see her grace pulsing inside the pendant Gabriel had said he'd made her. 

"Dean?"

"Yeah, Al?" he answered roughly. 

Alex raised her dark eyes up at him. "Can we go somewhere else?" she asked. "Somewhere quiet?"

Dean sucked in a breath and have her hand a squeeze as he turned for the door. Baby was outside waiting just where they left her under the orange glow of a streetlight, and Dean opened the driver's side door to let Alex slide in before climbing in after her. He drove to a secluded clearing outside of town, and Dean barely had the car in park before their mouths were once again locked together. This kiss was more passionate than the one they shared in the bar, deeper and with more feeling, and Alex opened quickly to allow Dean's tongue entrance. 

They were desperate and needy, pulling at each other's bodies and clothes until nothing separated them. "Backseat. More room," Dean groaned against her mouth and watched as Alex's naked form climbed over the leather seat. He quickly followed, his body covering hers as soon as he could.

Dean kissed his way down her neck and rolled a nipple between his thumb and forefinger as he nipped at her skin. Alex gripped his hair when his hand trailed lower, his fingertips skating along her side before finding their way between her legs. He propped up on one arm and kissed Alex hard before stroking her outer lips.

"Please," she whispered. 

"It's gonna be quick, Al," Dean warned her.

Alex held his face between her hands. "I know. I just, I need you inside me." The muscle in his jaw ticked and the two locked eyes as Dean squeezed her hip. She bit her lip, and he was done for.

Dean thrust into Alex quickly, the urgency returning to his movements, and she hooked her leg over his hip to keep him close while she kissed him. She broke away for air when he angled his hips, every thrust hitting just the right spot inside her, and Alex clung to his shoulders while the pressure built inside her.

"Shit, Dean," she gasped while he bit her earlobe. 

His hips stilled abruptly, and he pulled back to look at her. "You okay? Did I hurt you?"

"God, no!" she laughed and pulled him back down to her. "That was feeling awesome!"

Dean huffed a laugh, and Alex could see the tiny crinkle around his eyes in the dim glow from her grace. He started thrusting again, and Alex's eyes closed as her head fell back on the soft leather. Pretty soon, she felt the heat pooling low in her belly, and Dean moaned when she tightened around him.

"Al, I'm, I'm close. I can't--Fuck!" Dean growled into her neck as he shuddered and came, shooting long, hot spurts into her. He kept thrusting and reached down to hurriedly rub at her clit, pushing her over the edge. Alex was pretty sure she'd let scratches on his back, but she didn't have it in her to care as she cried out and spasmed around him. 

Dean peppered her face and chest with kisses as she came down, and Alex wrapped her arms tightly around him, burying her face in his chest. A tremor ran through Dean's body as he struggled to keep his weight off of her.

"Switch with me," he murmured against her hair, and temhey moved around until she was draped over his chest.

"Can we stay here?" Alex asked sleepily.

Dean rummaged around the floorboard until he found his phone in his jeans. He shot Sam a short text before reaching under the front seat for the blanket he kept there. 

"Yeah," he said as he pulled it over them. "We can stay." Dean raised his head when Alex stayed silent, but she was already asleep, her lips slightly parted. He smiled and wrapped one arm around her waist while the other fell off the seat, his fingers grazing the handle of his gun.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Does this make up for the last chapter being a little short? Did I do them justice? Let me know what you think.
> 
> Thanks for reading!


	13. Chapter 13

Dean and Alex woke with the dawn and shared a sleepy smile before climbing out of the car to get dressed. A dense fog covered the field they were in, and a strange shiver worked its way up Dean's spine as he stretched. He brushed by Alex to retrieve his gun from the backseat and held a finger to his lips as he glanced around. 

The air around them was unnaturally still, the clearing totally silent at a time when the world should have been waking up. Lightning cracked across the sky, and Dean started pushing Alex into the front seat.

"Dean, what--"

"Just get in the fucking car, Al!" 

He piled in behind her and slammed the locks down before pulling out his knife and slicing his palm open. "Glovebox," he told her while blood pooled in his hand. "There's chalk and paper with wards drawn on it. Third row down, draw those on the dashboard, windows, wherever you can reach, and they have to be exactly right. Got it?"

"Yeah, yeah, I got it," she nodded and fumbled with the latch before doing as instructed.

Dean frantically painted the angel banishing sigil on the window beside him while muttering apologies to the car. When he finished, he sat with his hand hovering over the sigil while he held his breath and looked around. Alex gripped the archangel blade Gabriel had given her and reached across the seat to take Dean's free hand. He held on tightly and swallowed hard as his eyes continued to rove over the landscape in front of them. 

Lightning cracked across the sky again before everything stopped, and time itself seemed to stand still save for the steady drop of blood falling from Dean's raised hand. Suddenly, a thin, orange strand of light appeared not ten feet in front of the car, and it grew steadily in size until it stretched to almost eight feet high. 

"Don't call him, Al," Dean muttered. Her eyes flicked over to the man beside her, and she knew he was referring to Gabriel. "Not yet."

He released Alex's hand when a figure in a long, dark jacket stepped through the portal, and Dean pulled an angel blade out of his jacket. The man in the coat looked around and nodded once before two hooded figures appeared behind him, their arms bound in front of them and feet chained together. 

"Dean Winchester," the man called, staring directly at the hunter, "we have a lot to discuss." His dark eyes landed on Alex's briefly before focusing on Dean's once more. "I imagine you want your mother back, and it's in her best interest that you cooperate. So, how about you step out and we talk like men?" 

Dean sucked in a sharp breath as he weighed his options. Cas had said that Michael was the one who had his mom, and he really doubted she'd changed hands since then, and everything else was pointing to this guy being him. Dean steeled his features and called out, knowing the douchebag could hear him. "I'll pass, thanks."

The stranger smirked and tilted his head. "What do you think your sigil is going to do to the two nephilims here, Dean? Think they'll get blown away, too, or will they stay here? You willing to take that chance?"

"Dean, I'm calling Gabe," Alex murmured.

"He's too valuable to lose now, Al. We can't."

"We don't have a choice!" she hissed.

"Alex, he might not survive a fight with Michael," Dean insisted. 

"I know, but we have to try. We need help."

"I'm getting tired of waiting, Dean!" the angel (Michael?) called as he gripped one of his prisoners and threw them to the ground before removing the hood. Mary blinked against the light and pushed herself up onto her knees on the grass. Her jaw was swollen, and blood trickled from her lip, but she made no move to wipe it away.

Dean held his hands up over the steering wheel, palms out. "Fine! Okay? I'm getting out." He opened the door and got out while continuing to hold his hands where the guy could see them.

Alex started to get out as well, but Dean shook his head, the movement barely detectable, but she caught it and stayed put. She watched Dean walk around to the front bumper and purposefully stand between her and the stranger. She silently prayed to Gabriel, quickly filling him in on the situation, as her heart threatened to leap from her chest.

"You know who I am," Dean was saying, "but I've never seen you around here. Got a name?"

"Michael," he said, "but I think you already knew that."

"Yeah, well you all look alike to me, so," Dean shrugged. 

"I'm not here to play games. I'm here to bargain."

"Bargain what?"

Michael nodded towards Mary's hunched figure on the ground. "Your mom, alive, for you. I'm gonna be staying here a while, and I need a vessel from this universe to do that." He stuffed his hands in his pockets and smirked. 

"No," Alex whispered as Dean's body went rigid.

"Or," Michael continued, "I can kill Mary now, and take off with Jack and Alex both. They'll be incredibly useful in keeping this vessel in one piece."

"No, no, no, no," Alex chanted.

"What guarantee do I have that you'll release her?" Dean asked.

"Why, I'm an angel of my word, Dean."

Dean looked from Michael to his mother, broken on the ground in front of him, and knew his decision was already made. He took a deep breath and prayed in his mind to Cas, filling him in and giving his best friend instructions on how to proceed. He looked over his shoulder at Alex, her eyes big and round as she shook her head back and forth. Dean gave her a sad smile and turned away before she could change his mind.

"Yes," Dean said, his voice surprisingly steady as he signed his own death warrant.

"No!" Alex screamed as a bright light began emanating from Michael's current vessel. She jerked on the door handle, but it wouldn't open. She looked up to see Gabriel shaking his head from the other side of the window, and she began beating on the glass, begging him to let her out, but the glass wouldn't break. 

Mary appeared in the driver's seat just in time to see her son become a vessel, and Jack and Gabriel were in the backseat in the next second. Alex watched in horror as Dean--no, Michael, she corrected herself--turned around, his features full of hatred, and the next thing she knew, she was staring out the windshield at the garage walls of the bunker.

"No!" she screamed again and scrambled out of the car, her hands raking through her hair. "Take me back!" she spit at Gabriel as he got out of the car.

"I can't, kiddo," he admitted, his face full of guilt. "This is the only place we're safe."

"Dean's back there!" Alex cried while Sam and Castiel ran into the room.

"Dean's where? Gabriel, you were supposed to bring them all back!" Sam shouted as he advanced on the archangel. "Where's my brother?"

"It was too late!" Gabriel snapped. "I was too late, okay?"

"We have to go back," Alex quaked. "We, we have to save him."

"We can't. He's already being used as a vessel," Gabriel explained. 

Castiel helped a limping Mary over to sit on the step going into the hallway before returning to the car for Jack. "Gabriel is right," he agreed as he adjusted his hold on the kid. "We need to make a new plan and take care of these two before rushing into anything. We don't stand a chance against Michael right now, not without killing Dean, too."

"Oh my God," Alex sobbed. "I'm gonna lose him, aren't I? I can't, I can't believe this is happening." 

Sam pulled her against his chest while she cried, and he stared hard at Cas. "There's gotta be a way," he growled. "There's always a way." 

Castiel pressed his lips into a thin line and nodded towards Mary, who still hadn't spoken. "Let's get to the library. We have a lot of research and planning to do."  
_____________

Dean opened his eyes, or at least he thought he did, but he couldn't remember the actual action. One second he was unconscious, and the next he was staring at an empty spot in a field. 

"I want you to see and hear and feel everything I do," his voice was saying, "but if you even think of ejecting me, Dean I swear to you that I will bury you so deep in your own mind that you won't even escape its confines when I leave your body."

Panic welled up in Dean's chest, but his own disgusted laugh echoed in his ears. His head shook slightly, and Michael spoke again. "You humans and your emotions, such strange things, especially for someone like yourself who feels everything so deeply. Sit back and enjoy the ride. We've got a lot of work to do."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I always wondered what it would look like if Dean were to actually be possessed, so I'm excited to dabble in it a bit. 
> 
> Enjoy!


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So first of all, Happy 40th Birthday Jensen Ackles! 
> 
> Also, thanks to my lovely readers for sticking with me this far.
> 
> Enjoy!

"Alex?" Sam spoke softly from the chair beside her, his elbows propped on his knees and hands loosely clasped between them. "We need to know everything that happened, okay?"

Alex sighed and pulled her jacket tighter around herself. She could still smell traces of the night before on the leather, and she wanted nothing more than to relive everything up until that morning. She'd be more than happy to forget everything after getting out of that damned car, but Sam was right. They needed to know. 

"Everything was great," she told them while staring down at the surface of the map table in front of her. "Last night we went out, ate, drank a little, and even danced." 

Sam's eyebrows rose when she mentioned his brother dancing. It was rare to see Dean dance unless he was falling over drunk, but that had been happening less and less over the years. "Then what happened?" he prodded. 

"We parked in this field outside of town. It was ringed with trees so no one could see us, you know, from the road." Alex blushed and traced the tail of South America as she spoke, and a small smile pulled at her lips. "It was really nice. We'd had such a good time together, and I didn't want it to end. We ended up falling asleep in the backseat."

"Sam received Dean's text message last night saying you wouldn't return until today," Castiel supplied from his spot beside Jack across the table. The angel hadn't quit fussing over the kid since he first laid hands on him in the garage, not that Jack minded. He was leaning into every touch, relishing the feel of gentle hands for the first time in too long.

Alex huffed a sad laugh. "I wondered why y'all hadn't come searching for us when I woke up this morning. Guess I passed out before Dean texted you, Sam." She took a deep breath before continuing. "We had just finished getting dressed this morning when Dean grabbed his gun. I don'tknow what set him off, maybe something in the air, but then lightening struck, and he was forcing me into the car and telling me to ward everything while he drew an angel banishing sigil on the window..."

"Keep going, kiddo." She looked up to see Gabriel nod at her, his brow furrowed and arms crossed over his chest.

"It got really quiet, and then this light thing appeared in front of us, and some guy stepped through it and pulled Jack and Mary out with him." Mary flinched at the mention of the transport but went back to staring blankly at the wall. "He wanted to talk to Dean, and he started threatening us." Her tear filled eyes met Gabriel's as she spoke. "I wanted to call you, but Dean wouldn't let me. He said you were worth too much to lose now. I swear I tried to convince him, but he wasn't having it."

The archangel softened and placed a hand on her shoulder. "It's okay, kid. You did the best you could. You called me eventually, right? It's not like you didn't say anything at all."

"As soon as he got out I started praying. Michael said he was gonna be here a while, but something about his vessel not holding up for long enough in this universe, I don't know, and he wanted Dean to be his vessel."

"Why would he agree to it, though?" Sam asked as he sat back in his chair. "I thought we had straightened all that out."

"He was going to kill me," Mary whispered. They all turned to look at her in shock. It was the first thing she'd said since getting back. She turned weary eyes on the group and raised a brow. "Michael was going to kill me and take them unless Dean agreed. He was caught, and Michael knew it."

"Dean couldn't risk any of your lives," Castiel told them. "He prayed to me to let me know what he was doing and why. He didn't think his life was worth more than even one of yours, let alone all three of you. Between Gabriel and myself, we had enough information to form a quick plan. He would fly you all to safety, but there was no way to save Dean once he had already resigned himself to being a vessel. It was risky enough, revealing Gabriel to be alive. Lucifer is still under the impression that he died during the apocalypse, so that's what Michael thought as well. We may have just given away knowledge of our greatest weapon."

"No," Alex said quietly. "We didn't. Sam, I still have my grace. Jack and I can train with Gabe, and the three of us will take down Michael."

Sam inhaled sharply and looked at Cas. "Think it'll work?"

Castiel narrowed his eyes at the pendant Alex wore before nodding. "Only if everyone is in agreement with the plan. It's basically a suicide mission of they fail, so no one will be forced into it."

"Dean's family," Jack told Alex. He grinned a little before nodding at her. "You are, too, actually. That's kinda cool."

"We'll get to work as soon as you take on your grace, but I don't think we should do that here," Gabriel commented while looking around the bunker. "This place might cave in if you take it now."

"Is there somewhere we can go?" Alex asked.

Gabriel nodded, and Sam stood up. "Then it's settled," Sam said. "Gabriel, take care of Alex and come straight back when you're done. Cas, time to strategize. We need a plan."

"I paid close attention to his patterns while we were over there," Jack interjected. "I think I can help with planning."

"Work on the best way to catch Michael off guard, then. Surprise is our best option at this point. Mom," Sam's voice softened some as he looked at her. "Let's get you cleaned up and something to eat, huh?"  
_____________

"Your friends will be plotting against me," Michael said casually while pacing in front of the fireplace of the old cabin he was in, his hands folded behind his back. "What do you think their plan of attack will be?"

Dean tried hard to bury any ideas he had about his family coming for him. He couldn't risk giving this guy anything to use against them.

"I noticed their savior was Gabriel, which was certainly a surprise. Lucifer told me he was dead, but then, he always did lie about everything. So I assume they will use him first, but let me tell you a secret, Dean," Michael said as he stopped and stared into an old, broken mirror, "I squashed my little brother like a big when he tried to rise up against me. This Gabriel will be no different. They won't stand a chance, and every last one will die at my hand of they continue to fight."

Suddenly, images of his family flashed through Dean's mind. Jack's broken body on the ground behind Cas as he tried and failed to protect himself. His mom, strung up by chains and struggling to breathe before the light left her eyes. Sammy, beaten to a bloody pulp and crawling away as Dean's own hand stabs an angel blade into his brother's back. The last was Alex, her eyes full of fear as he pinned her to the ground while she stuttered out apologies and declarations of love for Dean. That one ended with him smiling cruelly while slicing her throat and laughing when she bled out.

"If they fight, they will die."

Dean stayed the fear threatening to break down his walls and refused to relent. He had to be strong for them.

"Still don't want to talk, huh?" The familiar face in the mirror smirked. "Fine. I like doing things the fun way." 

Everything went dark, and Dean felt himself hit the floor before he was able to see again. "Wait, this can't be right," he said as his head whipped around. He was strapped to a chair in the bunker's dungeon, and his family was lined up against the far wall. "What's going on?"

Sam stepped forward and uncrossed his arms. "We're in my favorite play place, Dean." He tapped his temple. "Your subconscious." Sam continued to circle Dean as Cas dropped his angel blade from his sleeve.

"You think Hell was bad?" Cas laughed. "Even Hell has its limits."

"Anything is possible in here, though," Sam continued while running the edge of a blade across Dean's cheek. 

He jerked away and glared at his baby brother. "This isn't real," Dean muttered. 

"It's very real, handsome," Alex smirked. "We're going to have so much fun together."

"No. I won't tell you anything."

Cas gripped Dean's hair and yanked his head back. "You'll tell me anything I want to know," he growled while slicing into Dean's neck. Dean gritted his teeth, not wanting to give Michael the satisfaction of hearing him scream.

Alex straddled his lap and nuzzled the wound on his neck. "You're strong," she whispered against his skin. "I like that." She leaned back and gave him a sweet smile, but Dean's stomach rolled at the sight of something he used to love so much being corrupted by the blood smeared across Alex's face. 

"You're not her, not really."

"You're right," Sam said as he slid his arms around Alex's waist. She leaned back into his touch and stared up at him. "But I think it'll do the trick." He kissed Alex hard as she ground down on Dean's crotch.

"Get your hands off of her!" Dean snapped, the rage rolling off him in waves.

"We're just getting started," Cas whispered in Dean's ear.  
_____________

Alex opened her eyes as Gabriel dropped his arms from around her. They were in a large, white room, maybe a particularly clean warehouse? She wasn't sure.

"We don't have much time, kiddo," Gabriel told her. "Are you sure you want to do this?"

She swallowed and nodded while shaking out her hands. "I'm sure. Let's do this."

"I never wanted this for you, Alex, any of it. I wanted you to have a safe, normal life away from all of this crap. I wanted you to be happy." He reached up and cradled her face with his hand. "You're the best thing I've ever created. Everything else is nothing compared to you, and I want you to know that I'm proud of you. You've grown into a strong, beautiful, brave young woman, and you deserve so much more than the lot you've been given."

"I gave up on being happy a long time ago, Gabe. Let's just get this over with."

He pressed his lips into a line and nodded before backing away. "I'm going to remove the glass completely, so it'll just be the gold swirls left over. There's going to be a big explosion, but you'll be fine, okay? Close your eyes and go to your happy place, wherever that might be, because you'll probably feel some pain as the power takes over. I'll still be here when it's over." 

Alex shut her eyes tight and tried to picture what her happy place would look like. Dean. She focused on his image and painted the scene around them in her mind as she heard the sound of glass shattering. He was hovering above her and staring into her eyes. His expression was soft as he gently stroked the side of her face and smiled. 

"I love you," Alex whispered as the pain hit. 

Electricity flowed through her veins, and she gasped but concentrated on Dean's face inching ever closer to her own. The electric current was pulsing inside her now, building and building with each breath she took. 

Gabriel watched as a tear escaped his little girl's eye and rolled down her cheek. Maybe this was a bad idea. Maybe they went too far. 

Alex cried out when the pain peaked and it felt like she'd be ripped apart. A bright light exploded from her chest, and the building shook as the shock wave hit.

Gabriel lowered his arm from his face and stared at where Alex was crouched on the ground. "You alright, kiddo?" he called out.

She stood slowly and raised her head while opening her eyes, her eyes that were now glowing a brilliant gold.


	15. Chapter 15

"You alright, kiddo?"

Alex stood and blinked a couple of times before flexing her hands. Gabriel was staring at her with wide eyes from about ten feet away, his body language screaming caution, but what caught her attention was the dull glow emanating from within him. His grace, she realized. She could see it now.

"I'm fine," she said with surprise while looking over her skin. There wasn't a mark or blemish on it, and the electric current that had surged within her seconds ago quieted down to a steady thrum beneath her skin. It was a heady feeling, and she yearned to discover her limits. 

Gabriel nodded once before taking a slow step in her direction. "We've gotta get out of here before anyone shows up. A power surge like that was sure to set off alarms somewhere." He eyes her warily. "Alex, are you okay to return to the bunker?"

She frowned as she looked up at him. "You mean am I going to hurt anyone?" Gabriel shrugged. "Of course not," Alex scoffed. "I still feel like me. I'm just...plugged in or something."

He smiled and held out a hand, seemingly convinced she wasn't a threat. "C'mon, kiddo."

She took his hand and went willingly into his arms, squeezing his jacket tightly and relishing the feel of the stitching under her fingertips and the rush of wind in her hair. Everything felt heightened, and Alex grinned up at Gabriel when her feet hit solid ground. He smirked down at her before looking over her shoulder at someone else.

Alex turned around to see Sam and Mary staring open mouthed at her. She furrowed her brows and turned back to Gabriel. "What's wrong? I didn't get mutilated or anything, did I?"

"No," he chuckled. "I think it's your eyes. They're still glowing pretty bright."

"Oh," Alex murmured while bringing a hand to her face. "I don't...Shit, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to freak anyone out."

"It's fine," Sam spoke up from behind her. "It'll probably fade in a few minutes. How are you feeling?" He was closer now, she could feel the energy his soul put off, just like she could feel Gabriel's power.

"Odd," she answered while facing the hunter. "It's like I've finally been put together, but I'm all out of sorts, too." 

He nodded and stared at her a second longer before averting his gaze to where sandwich ingredients were spread on the table. "You hungry? I know it's been a crazy day, but we've got a lot to do, so you'll need the fuel."

Her stomach turned at the thought of trying to eat anything while knowing where Dean was and what he was most likely suffering through. "I don't know, Sam. I--" She stopped when she caught the worried glance he threw Gabriel's way and gave an apologetic smile. "Maybe just a cup I coffee. I don't know if I can hold anything else down right now. You know, nerves and whatnot."

"Yeah, okay, sure," Sam said quickly before starting the coffee maker.

"Sam, you don't have to do that," Alex offered. "I can take care of it."

He waved a dismissive hand over his shoulder, and Alex noticed a slight tremble in his fingers as he scooped out the grounds. Maybe this was affecting him more than he was letting on.

"Let's go see if we can steal Jack away from Cas for a few minutes to train," Gabriel said casually. "That way the coffee is ready when we're done."

Alex cast a worried look in Sam's direction before letting Gabriel lead her into the war room as she'd started calling it. Cas and Jack had papers spread out over the table and were pointing at various things and commenting to each other.

"Do you think it'll work?" Jack was asking Castiel. 

"As long as Alex can hone her skills in time, it shouldn't be a problem," the angel replied as he clapped a hand on Jack's shoulder. "You can do this, Jack. I have faith in you."

"And I have faith in this kid right here,"Gabriel announced with a smirk.

Castiel turned and greeted the pair with a small smile. "I do as well. Alex, your grace suits you well."

"Thanks, Cas. What do you have so far?" she asked while peering around his shoulder. 

"We did a location spell," Castiel explained. "It looks like Michael has settled in an abandoned cabin not far from where he crossed over."

"Is he alone?" Gabriel questioned as he examined the plans laid out on the table.

"We've not seen any sign of other angels, but that could change at any time, so..."

"...Our best bet is to strike quickly," Gabriel finished with a sigh. He rubbed the back of his neck and straightened. "C'mon, kiddo. We'd better get started."  
_____________

"Not real, not real, not real."

Alex--no, no, no, not Alex--was sitting on the edge of a table in the dungeon, her legs wrapped around Sam's waist and moaning obscenely while he licked and sucked on her neck. Her dark eyes danced with amusement as they landed on Dean's face, and she tossed her head back with a sigh. He huffed and looked away, glaring at a spot on the floor.

"Watch!" Cas commanded, punctuating the sentence with a blow to the jaw. Dean's head snapped back painfully before Cas gripped his hair and forced him to look at his brother and girlfriend together. "This isn't anything new for you, is it, Dean, this fear of her moving on to someone better? And who better than Sammy to give her what you couldn't? He's going to leave eventually anyway. It might as well be with her."

Dean's heart plummeted. Cas--not Cas, not Cas--was right. Everyone leaves eventually. He's poison. He doesn't deserve to have his family. They don't need him. They just put up with him...

"No!" Dean growled and wrenched free of Not!Cas's hold. "It's not real!"

"Sam..." Alex breathed. "God, you do it so much better than Dean did."

"Not real, not real, not real," Dean chanted. It was the only thing that kept him grounded throughout this endless torture. 

"This can stop, Dean," Sam told him while Alex ran her hands through his hair. "Just tell me what their most likely plan is, and we can be done with all of this."

"Bite me," Dean spit.

Sam smirked. "How about I bite her instead?"

Dean squeezed his eyes shut and continued repeating his mantra while ignoring the sounds of Alex and Sam across the room. Cas sliced into his skin, and Dean gritted his teeth against the pain.

"Not real, not real, not real..."  
_____________

"Focus your mind," Jack coached while Alex squeezed her eyes shut. "Relax. It's easy."

"Says you," she muttered. 

"What?"

"Nothing," Alex grinned. "Just focusing my mind over here."

"Oh, okay, cool. So what I do is hold out my hand and push my power out through it, like a canon or something." 

Alex cracked an eye open to look at the kid beside her. He was standing stock still, his right hand outstretched and eyes closed. His brow was furrowed slightly, but other than that his face appeared almost serene. She mirrored Jack's position before glancing at Gabriel and Cas.

"Does this look right?" she asked.

Cas tilted his head and narrowed his eyes while Gabriel pushed off the wall he'd been leaning against. "You're too stiff, kiddo. You look like you're trying to poop out a brick."

"That's because I don't know what I'm doing, Gabe," she snapped. "I don't even have a target to aim at!"

Gabriel rolled his eyes and snapped his fingers. A row of Bozo Bop bags appeared several feet away, their painted smiles taunting Alex.

"Those things are creepy as shit," Alex told the archangel. 

"Just wait until Sam sees them," he smirked and pointed at the one in front of her. "Now go ahead and hit one."

Alex faced the clown and held her hand out in front of her like Jack had showed her. The clown beside hers rocked gently back and forth, and she saw Jack focusing his power on it.

"Just focus," he told her. "Find what drives you, and use it to manipulate the target."

She squared her shoulders and closed her eyes while breathing deeply. Dean. She needed to save him. He needed her to come through for him. His life depended on her success. 

Alex felt the energy in her veins and tried to divert the flow into the palm of her hand. It pulsed as it pooled there, waiting for direction, and she thrust her palm forwards, her fingers stretching wide with the motion. Power burst forth and the target exploded, bits of sand and rubber flying through the air.

"Well, that was...dramatic," Castiel commented flatly.

Alex winced. "Sorry, I wasn't sure how to, you know, anything."

Gabriel was doubled over with laughter and clutching his abdomen, and Jack had a kind, patient expression on his face as he looked at Alex. "Maybe try using a bit less power. I need you to remove Michael from Dean's body and hold him so that I can kill him. Try again."

Alex tried to smile back, but it looked more like a grimace. Her face was beet red with embarrassment, and her flush only deepened when Sam rushed in the room. 

"What was that? Are you guys okay?"

"Alex is...trying...to use...her powers!" Gabriel gasped out between bursts of laughter. 

Sam's eyebrows rose high on his forehead as he took in the sand and pieces of rubber scattered across the floor. His eyes landed on Alex, who quickly looked away and pushed her hair back while putting one hand on her hip.

"I'm sorry about the mess," she sputtered. "I promise I'll clean it up when we're done."

"Just be careful, Alex. We don't want to lose anyone else." Sam stuffed his hands in his pockets and stalked out of the room. 

His words stung Alex like she'd been slapped, and she flinched back. Sam already counted his brother as dead. It was her fault. She should have started praying as soon as they were in the car, but she'd waited, trusting Dean's judgement in the situation. 

Anger mixed with a desperation to save the man should loved, and Alex glared at the next target in the line-up. Her hand shot out with a growl, and the clown split cleanly down the middle. She kept firing off bursts of energy at the targets, each one falling apart under her power, until the last one standing deflated completely, a small pile of sand beside it. Alex was huffing by the time she was finished, and when she faced the men in the room, her anger slowly faded.

Castiel's eyebrows were raised, and Jack was staring at her wide eyed. Gabriel was full on grinning, and he gave her a thumbs-up. "That's my girl," he chuckled. 

Alex huffed and looked at the debris. "Let's go again."  
_____________

Three hours later, and Alex was panting while she held the water suspended in the air. Switching the sand for water was Castiel's idea. It would be harder to contain while maintaining the shape of the clown, and although she'd failed several times after the change, Alex finally felt like she'd gotten the hang of it. Jack stood beside her, his hand also outstretched, and closed his fist tightly before the water dissipated in a puff of white vapor.

They grinned at each other while Cas and Gabriel clapped. They'd been successful five times in a row and were confident they could keep it up.

"You're doing well, both of you," Castiel said. "Now it's time to see how you fare while in the midst of a battle." He tossed them each an angel blade before dropping one from his sleeve. "Gabriel and myself will not hold back, doing so would only hinder you during the real battle."

Castiel and Gabriel circled the two nephilims like prey, their weapons held ready in their grasps, and Cas flipped his sword once before advancing. 

"Now fight!"


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay. It was a busy weekend, and this chapter was a headache, but I felt like it needed to be written. Thankfully I was able to draw inspiration from last week's episode for inspiration on the last section.
> 
> Enjoy!

Sam was slumped against the wall in his brother's bedroom, his head cradled in his hands. 

After he'd left the workout room, he'd returned to his mom in the kitchen and took her to get cleaned up before putting her to bed. Sam was worried about Mary. She'd barely spoken since they'd gotten her back, and she never did anything without first being instructed to do so. Sam didn't know what exactly Michael had done to her over there, but it had broken her completely. 

She was going to need total care for a while, and he didn't know if he could handle it alone. Dean was better at that stuff. 

Sam threaded his fingers through his hair and released a shaky sigh when he thought of his older brother. Dean wasn't coming back from this, not in one piece anyway. The Dean Winchester he knew was gone, and he'd be lucky to get back even a drooling shell of the man once Michael was finished with him.

The others thought they could save Dean and still kill Michael, but Sam was smarter than that. Plans rarely went how they were supposed to, and when they did, it was only due to darker forces setting up a trap. Things never went their way--they never would. 

Sam had spent most of his life looking on the bright side of things, keeping the faith when all Dean saw was darkness. He'd spent countless hours pouring over books and internet articles, interviewing witnesses and picking apart crime scenes, all in order to "find another way" as he'd told Dean so many times in the past. Most of the time his search yielded promising results, but there were times when even Sam had to concede and face the ugly truth of whatever situation they'd gotten themselves into.

But now he was just too tired.

Sam knew what was coming, could feel it in his bones as well as elderly folks could feel an oncoming storm. He'd join in the battle to save their planet yet again, but this time he knew without a shadow of a doubt that he'd be carrying his brother's lifeless body back home. Sam could already feel Dean's blood on his hands and the way his head would occasionally brush against his back while Sam hauled him to the car and eventually down the halls to this room in the bunker. 

Sam shuddered as he thought about the last time he'd had to place his brother's corpse on the bed in front of him. They weren't on good terms when Dean died, and a string of apologies and dying confessions did nothing to alleviate the guilt he'd felt knowing Dean thought Sam had hated him when he died. 

This time would be different. Things had been pretty great between them the last couple of years. Occasionally they'd get into an argument but were usually on the same page. This time, Dean would die knowing how much his brother loved him, and Sam would only carry the pain of knowing what could have been had his brother not met his end. 

They'd begun to mentor younger hunters, to be the ones people called for advice or help on a particular case. They'd begun to take on the role Bobby had played for so long. It was something Sam had dreamed about for a long time. Most hunters didn't live as long as they had, or, he guessed, didn't get brought back as often as they had, so it was a miracle Sam and Dean had even reached this point in their lives. For a moment Sam had allowed himself to believe they could continue like that for several years. 

How could he have let himself become so stupid? 

Sam wiped a hand down his face and let his head fall back against the wall with a light thud as he squeezed his eyes shut to quell the flow of tears threatening to spill forth. He'd managed to hold it together in front of the others, but now, surrounded by the familiar sights and smells of Dean, it was too much to handle, and Sam. Just. Broke.

He bit his fist to try and muffle the sound of his sobbing, but still the little gasps escaped, and Sam prayed no one wandered down this hall for fear that they might hear him falling apart. He lifted his eyes to the ceiling and silently begged Chuck to somehow get them out of this mess, to save his brother, to save their world. It was the first time Sam had actually prayed to God in a long time, the last being before He had revealed Himself to the Winchesters, and he wasn't sure if Chuck would hear him out or not.

Of course, Chuck had rarely been kind to Sam.

The door opened as the swish of a well worn trenchcoat breezed into the room, and Sam hurriedly tried to compose himself before the angel caught on. Castiel was halfway across the room when he stiffened and turned to face the man crouched in the corner. 

"Sam, I apologize. I didn't realize anyone was in here." He looked almost embarrassed as he stumbled over the words. His eyes darted between the desk and the door before settling on the hunter once more. "I'll just--"

"It's fine, Cas," Sam sighed, waving his friend over. 

Castiel hesitated only a moment before walking over and sliding down the wall, mirroring Sam's position beside him. "I thought coming here might help calm me before the battle. It seems to have had the opposite effect on you, though."

Sam huffed a laugh and scratched the back of his head. "I didn't come here to find a calm or whatever." He stared at the records stacked by the bed to avoid his friend's gaze.

"You're hiding."

He nodded, eyes falling to his hands. "I couldn't, I didn't want to let them see me like this."

"That's understandable, Sam. I imagine you're feeling a bit overwhelmed by everything that's going on, but we're going to get Dean back."

Sam glanced over at him. "You don't really believe that, do you?" he scoffed. 

Castiel's brows pulled together. "I have to." 

They sat together in silence for a few minutes, the weight of his statement heavy in the air before the angel spoke again. "Jack told me some of what Michael did to Mary and himself. It seems he prefers psychological torture to Lucifer's more physical methods. Apparently it is more successful in breaking the subject." Sam tensed up at the mention of torture but managed to stay quiet. Castiel seemed to sense Sam's discomfort and shifted before continuing. "Sam, when we get Dean back," he held up a hand and raised his brows when it looked like the man would protest, "when we get him back, you may need to prove that he can trust you again. No doubt Michael is exploiting every insecurity your brother has in order to get more information on how we may attack him, and your relationship is sure to be a large part of that."

"You think Michael will use me to break Dean," Sam stated.

"You, me, Alex..." Castiel ticked them off on his fingers as he spoke. "His mental state will be unstable to say the least. Jack handled the torture incredibly well, but he doesn't feel things as deeply as Dean. He doesn't understand the loss and pain associated with forming close bonds. Dean...well he understands pain better than anyone ever should."

"And Mom?" 

"Your mother is barely functioning. It seems Michael stripped her of any will she had. She'll trust whoever is making her decisions."

"That's not scary at all," Sam muttered while closing his eyes. He was exhausted, but somehow the idea of sleep scared him more than facing the horrors of the day.

Castiel hummed in agreement before standing. He walked over to the desk and trailed his left hand lightly over the surface before smiling down at a picture of himself and the Winchesters in front of the Impala. He wasn't sure who took it--perhaps Bobby?--but they were full on laughing at something that had just happened, their eyes creased in amusement and smiles stretched wide across their faces. Castiel flipped it over and held it up to the light to examine the all caps handwriting on the back.

"TEAM FREE WILL, SPRING 2012."

"We will get your brother back, Sam," Castiel announced suddenly. "I won't lose another member of my family." He dropped the picture back onto the desk before striding quickly out of the room.

Oh how Sam wished Cas was right. He dropped his head back into his hands as another tear escaped and dripped off the tip of his nose.  
_____________

Blood dripped from the tip of Dean's nose. He was slumped forwards, his chin resting on his chest. His arms were tied behind him, and if he was being honest with himself, that was the only thing keeping him from falling out of the chair and onto the concrete floor. One eye was swollen shut, his jaw was throbbing, and Dean didn't think he'd ever get rid of the metallic taste in his mouth. 

"Either you're incredibly strong willed or incredibly stupid," Michael said as he gripped Dean's jaw and forced the hunter to look at him. 

Michael had assumed Alex's appearance this time, and yeah, it physically hurt Dean to look into those eyes and see disgust staring back at him, but he couldn't find it in himself to care anymore, so he stayed silent as the archangel appraised him. 

"Either way, I'm afraid we are going to have to cut this session short. I'm expecting reinforcements any time now, and I need to be ready to give them orders. Your family is going to die, Dean," he paused and dropped Dean's face, "all because you were too weak to save them."

Michael walked out, and everything briefly went black again before Dean was staring up at the ramshackle cabin's ceiling. Of course, it wasn't really him it all. Michael was still in control of this body, so it was the archangel--not Dean--who rose up and rolled his shoulders once before stretching to his full height and striding for the door. 

He stepped out into the night air and nodded as he took in the small gathering of angels before him. Zechariah came forward and furrowed his brows when he recognized the angel but not the vessel. "Something you wish to say, Zechariah?"

Shock briefly crossed the angel's face, but he quickly schooled his features into an expression of indifference. "I was simply noticing your change of vessel, sir."

"And?" Michael prompted. 

"Nothing, sir." Zechariah cleared his throat before pushing on. "Our forces are in position; the perimeter is secure. Would you like me to send a scout to gather intel?"

Dean snarled causing Michael to smirk. "No, I think we'll wait them out, let them come to us. It shouldn't take long."

"Yes, sir." Zechariah returned to the ranks and began barking orders while Dean continued to seethe. His hate was pushing against Michael's hold on the human, so he retired into the cabin.

"You don't like my colleague," Michael laughed once the door was secured behind him. "I assume that's because you had dealings with this world's counterpart, correct?" He shook his head as Dean pounded away inside his own skull, looking for an escape. "Zechariah is my number two, Dean," Michael said sternly. "Get used to it. We have work to do."


	17. Chapter 17

When dawn broke, it was slowly. Grey light crept up from the east chased by fiery tongues of pink and orange, casting just enough light to see but remain unseen by others. It was cold for spring, and a fine mist blanketed the ground. It was a time when most animals were silent. Birds hadn't yet begun to sing, and squirrels were still waking up. Even the deer, who were usually grazing the meadows at this time of day, were in hiding. 

A small log cabin sat in a clearing ringed with trees and bushes beside a small pond, and a lamp inside lot up the windows with a warm, comforting glow. Ivy climbed up the rocks of the stone chimney, taking hold in the tiny fissures and growing until yet another section broke free and tumbled to the ground. The front porch sagged on one side, the years of wind and rain having finally caught up to the structure.

A soldier kept watch several hundred yards into the woods, his blade held ready as he paced back and forth. A low whistle drew his attention to the right, and he paused before going to investigate. A dark haired woman was crouched on the ground, her legs hugging her knees as she rocked back and forth, and she looked up at him with large, dark eyes. He was about to ask who she was when the woman smirked, and someone grabbed him from behind, slicing his throat in the process. 

Light footsteps crept through the underbrush as five figures danced their way under the trees to their next victim. Their moves were precise, though they varied their technique so as to not give the enemy too much time to prepare once they caught on to what was happening. The group paused at the edge of the clearing and fanned out to approach the cabin from all sides.

Sam shook his head at Cas. It was too easy. There was no way those angels should have been taken out so quickly. He motioned with his hand that they should wait in the tree line and observe a while before continuing. 

Castiel hesitated as he scanned the area before nodding in agreement and passed the message along to Gabriel, who then signaled Jack and Alex. They would wait one hour before advancing. Until then, it was a waiting game.  
_____________

Zechariah clinched and unclinched his fists repeatedly as he stared across the room at the cabin door. He was tired of waiting, and he was tired of hearing his brothers fall at the hands of the enemy while he sat on his thumbs. 

"Sit down, Zechariah," Michael ordered from his seat beside the window.

"Sir, we're getting killed out there. Let me go out and put a stop to it," he insisted, walking over and placing his hands flat on the table. "It will be over quickly, and we can be done with this nonsense."

Michael glared at the angel, his green eyes dark even in the light from the oil lamp beside him. "You think this to be nonsense?" 

Zechariah straightened. "Our brothers are being slaughtered out there, sir. I only wish to know why."

Michael folded his hands across his abdomen and tilted his head. "Not that you deserve an answer, I should smite you now for even questioning your orders, but we are playing a game of chess. We aren't facing humans and demons as we did in our world. There are humans and angels and nephilims outside," he said pointing to the door, "and they are working together to take us down. This game requires strategy to win. I thought you understood that."

"I do, sir."

"Good." Michael rose and ambled over to the door. He had his hand on the knob when he turned and spoke over his shoulder. "Prepare for the reinforcements to arrive. I'm going to have a little chat with our friends out here."  
_____________

Alex's heart pounded as the front door opened and Dean--no, Michael--stepped out. Outwardly he was just as breathtaking as he always was, but there was something lacking in his face and the way he moved. This was not Dean Winchester she knew. This was a monster hell-bent on destroying her world and all the people she loved.

They'd waited only twenty minutes before he showed himself, and Alex's legs were grateful. She wasn't exactly relishing the idea of being crouched in the same position for an hour. She followed the figure as he took a seat in the rocking chair on the porch and propped his feet on the railing. The asshole smirked and laced his hands together behind his head as he reclined, taunting them all with his cheery mood.

"You can come out now," he called. "All...five of you," he added, scanning the tree line. 

Alex's eyes flicked over to Gabriel twenty yards away, and a minute shake of his head told her to stay put. She huffed and pressed her lips into a thin line but kept her position. Gabriel looked in Castiel's direction and must have sent him some kind of message because he immediately raised from his crouch and stepped out of hiding. 

"Gabriel!" Michael exclaimed. "I'll be, well not damned per say, but you get my drift. I've gotta say, you're shorter in this universe. It's not very intimidating."

"It's not supposed to be," Gabriel quipped. He gripped his blade and stared at the other archangel, and goosebumps rose on Alex's arms. The air was charging as the two beings sized each other up.

Michael narrowed his eyes and stood, dropping his blade from his sleeve as Zechariah joined him on the porch. "What do you hope to gain by siding with them, brother? Join me, and we'll--"

"You're no brother of mine, dickwad," Gabriel spit as lightning streaked across the sky.

Michael nodded. "Then neither is he," he said as an angel appeared directly behind Gabriel. 

Gabriel spun and narrowly dodged the blade being thrust at his middle before grabbing the wrist of his assailant and jerking it forwards. He growled when he came face to face with the angel. "Raphael, I should've known you'd be part of this!" 

Six other angels popped up, surrounding them, and Castiel and Sam rushed the group while Alex and Jack ran up to the side of the house. 

"Just like we practiced, Alex," Jack told her as he stepped out and blasted an angel headed their way. 

She followed Jack, her hand outstretched in Michael's direction. He and Zechariah had joined the battle, but he froze when Alex took aim, his eyes immediately snapping onto her form. He shuddered and glared at her before disappearing entirely. 

A half-breath later, an iron hand was clasped around her throat, and Alex let out a strangled cry as she clawed at the all too familiar forearm across her chest. 

"Do you really think you can pull me?" he rumbled in her ear. "You're an abomination, nothing!"

"Fuck you!" Alex gasped before landing a sharp elbow in Michael's solar plexus. He let out a grunt, and Alex used the distraction to break his hold. She spun and faced him, blocking his blade as he brought it down to stab her.

"Alex, no!" Gabriel called out, but she ignored him and swung with her left fist. Michael batted it away and sliced her arm right above her elbow, causing Alex to drop her blade, before he shoved her hard, knocking her onto the ground. 

"Dean loves you, you know," Michael told her as he walked towards her, "more than life itself." 

Alex stretched her hand out towards him again intent on pulling him regardless of whether or not Jack was ready, but Michael snatched her wrist and gave it a sharp twist, snapping the bones in her forearm with a sickening crack. She bit her lip to contain her scream and scrambled backwards. 

"That's why he's still awake in here," Michael continued, tapping his temple. He kicked her side, and Alex coughed as she rolled onto her knees. "I want him to feel what it's like to kill you."

The ground shook with the force of an explosion, and Alex fell to her belly while light burst from the center of the battle a few yards away. 

"Hey, Gabriel!" Michael yelled as he yanked Alex towards him by her ankle. She panicked, the feeling of being dragged towards a monster blurring the line between reality and her imagination, so Alex twisted and gave a hard kick, but he caught her other leg and quickly straddled her chest. "Eye for an eye, brother! You kill my brother, I kill your daughter!" 

"Dean!" Alex cried as she wriggled beneath the archangel. "It's not your fault, do you hear me? I don't blame you, not for this, not for anything. I love you, okay?"

"That's cute, mutt," Michael laughed as he raised his blade over his head, "but I'm tired of listening to your crap." 

She was prepared for the agony of a blade piercing her chest. Alex imagined it would be similar to what she experienced when she fought Gilda and got speared in the shoulder. She was prepared for the tearing of muscles and coughing on blood. Hell, she was even prepared to embrace the darkness and go quickly.

What she wasn't prepared for was the blur that crashed into Michael as he brought his blade down.

Jack was behind her in an instant, pulling her up into a seated position with his arm wrapped tightly around her shoulders. "The hell was that?!" Alex exclaimed before the ground shook with another explosion. Her head whipped back towards where Michael had landed, and her heart dropped as she saw Michael shoving a lifeless body off of himself.

"Gabriel," Jack murmured. "It was Gabriel."

Michael stood and spit on the charred outline of the archangel's wings before wiping his mouth with the sleeve of his jacket and turning towards the nephilims behind him. 

Alex's hand shot out, her fury and pain locking Michael into place. "You killed my dad!" she screamed as a tear slipped down her face. Castiel stepped up behind her, his jaw clenched tight while Sam stopped on her other side. 

"You fools!" Michael growled. "This world isn't worth saving." He glared at Sam. "They aren't worth saving!" 

"That's not for you to decide," Castiel said quietly.

Alex pushed every ounce of power she had out through her hand, and Dean's body vibrated as Michael was extracted in a golden glow of light that shot out of Dean's mouth and rose high in the air above them. Dean collapsed, but no one dared move as Alex worked to contain the archangel's raw grace.

"You got him?" Sam asked. Alex nodded stiffly, and Castiel laid a heavy hand on Jack's shoulder. 

"Now! Go now!"

Jack closed his eyes, his face a mask of concentration as he curled his hand into a tight fist. The golden cloud expanded slightly before collapsing in on itself with a deafening crash.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not gonna lie, this chapter started off super easy, but it ended up fighting me towards the end. There's still one more chapter to go that I'll try to get up ASAP, so hang with me til then.
> 
> Thanks for reading!


	18. Chapter 18

Everything was silent for a beat before they were all kicking up dirt to get to Dean. Sam reached his brother's side first, his long legs giving him an easy lead on the others, and he slid to a stop before pulling Dean into his lap.

"Dean? Hey, hey, hey, wake up, man. Wake up! C'mon now don't do this to me, Dean. You can't leave us." 

Alex knelt on Dean's other side and gently brushed a strand of hair away from his eyes. She cradled his face in her hands as she searched for some sign of life, but he remained unnaturally still. "Sam, I, I don't know if he--"

"He's fine!" Sam snapped before continuing to try and rouse his brother. 

Alex covered her mouth with her hand to stifle a sob as she rocked back on her heels. She couldn't believe how they'd ended up at this point, how things could have gone so wrong and Gabriel and Dean both ended up dead. She pulled her legs up and rested her head on her knees as sobs wracked her body. 

She heard a sharp inhale and looked up as Jack's fingers fell away from Dean's forehead. He glanced around wildly and fought to escape Sam's hold, but Sam held tight to his brother, refusing to let him get away.

"Dean, you're fine. You're okay. He's gone," Sam told him. 

"Sammy?"

Sam nodded and swallowed back the growing lump in his throat. "Yeah, Dean. I'm here."

Dean gripped the front of Sam's flannel and pulled him close. "Gabriel!" He found Alex's face, and it seemed to tell him everything he needed to know because immediately guilt and regret flashed in his eyes. "I'm so sorry, Al. I--"

He was cut off by Alex throwing her arms around his neck. "It wasn't your fault," she mumbled into his neck as she breathed in his scent. 

"But I--"

"Shut up and let me hold you, Dean."

He sighed and wrapped his arms around her, hugging her close and enjoying the feel of the real Alex against his body. It was real. All of it, and Dean buried his nose in her dark hair, inhaling the smell of her shampoo while his hands traced up and down her back.

Dean opened his eyes and stretched a hand out to Cas who held it awkwardly but gave it a firm squeeze. "Thanks for taking care of them, man. I didn't, uh, I'm sorry I had to put that on you," he said as his brows pulled together. 

Castiel nodded and looked away quickly. "Of course."

"Can you stand?" Alex asked after pulling back to look at him. 

"God I hope so," Dean told her, "because I don't want to have to deal with smelling Sam's sweaty ass while he carries me to the car."

Sam huffed a laugh and swatted his brother on the shoulder before getting to his feet and holding out a hand. Dean gripped it and pulled himself up and took a moment to look over his family. Jack was standing off to the side, his hands stuck in his jacket pockets, and Dean brushed by Sam to envelope the kid in a big hug.

"Thank you for bringing my mom home, Jack, and for saving me." He stepped back but kept one hand on Jack's shoulder while patting his cheek with the other. "Man, you're growing up," Dean grinned before turning around. "Hey, where is she?"

Sam ran a hand through his hair and avoided his brother's eyes. "She's, uh..."

"Sammy," Dean started, his voice coming out slightly hoarse, "where's Mom?"

"She's alive, but uh," Sam swallowed, "Mom's not exactly in fighting shape right now mentally." He stared at Dean for a long moment before looking away. "She's been through a lot," he mumbled. 

Dean nodded and rubbed a hand down his face, the gesture something Alex didn't think she'd ever get to see again, and she subconsciously moved closer to him. He wrapped an arm around her shoulders and pulled her into his side while really looking at her for the first time since he woke up. Dean frowned, and Alex mirrored his expression.

"What?"

Dean's fingertips gently brushed Alex's cheek. "I felt your bones snap in my hand, Al," he muttered quietly, "but you seem fine now. I don't get it."

"Apparently Jack healed me right after Gabe knocked Michael away. I didn't notice it until after we killed him. I guess I was so caught up in my rage that I just didn't pay any attention to it." She bit her lip and looked at where Cas was now kneeling over Gabriel's body. "I was so mad, and now I'm just..." Alex trailed off and hastily wiped at her eyes with her free hand. 

Dean pulled her into a tight hug and kissed her head while she nuzzled into his chest. "C'mon. Let's go take care of him."

The small group gathered around Gabriel's feet, not wanting to disrupt the outline of his large wings, and Sam cleared his throat. "I'll go see if there's anything in the house we can use. Jack, do you mind helping me?" 

Alex curled into Dean's side, slipping her hand between his jacket and shirt, and looked over what was left of the only real dad she'd ever had. She had hated him at first, blaming him for everything that went wrong in her life, but eventually she saw that he really did care, and that Gabriel did what he had to in order to protect her. His last action was saving her life, and her heart gave a small twinge as she realized she'd never get to thank him for it.

Sam and Jack returned with some old quilts, and Cas helped them wrap Gabriel's body before silently carrying him towards the woods while the others followed. They eventually reached the car where she was parked off a forgotten dirt road, and Gabriel was carefully loaded in the trunk before they headed home.

The car ride home was silent. Either no one knew what to say or they were just too tired at this point, and even the radio stayed off. Sam drove while Alex curled up in Dean's lap, her fist still clutching the front of his black t-shirt as Dean rested his cheek on the top of her head. The few days apart had seemed like a lifetime, and they refused to put anymore distance between each other.

Once they reached the bunker, Castiel retrieved his brother's body and carried him up onto a grassy knoll before gathering the wood necessary to build a pyre. They worked wordlessly, the joy of saving Dean having faded so that only their sorrow of losing Gabriel remained. Sam and Dean lifted Gabriel's body onto the pile and stepped back, Dean wrapping his arms around Alex's waist from behind. 

"He believed in humanity," Castiel said as he lit the fire. "When it came down to the wire, Gabriel sided not with Heaven or Hell, but with Earth, and although he hid and generally tried to stay away from the fighting, he stood up to his brothers when he had to." Castiel swallowed and hesitated, looking over at Alex who gave him a watery smile. 

"You're doing great, man," Dean told the angel before dropping a kiss on Alex's head. He rested his chin on her shoulder and watched the flames rise.

Castiel cleared his throat. "Gabriel...he was the best older brother I had. When he loved, he did so fiercely, and his daughter is proof of that. He would have done anything for you, Alex." 

She nodded and shut her eyes as she leaned against Dean's firm chest, drawing strength from his touch. "I know," Alex whispered, not trusting her voice at a normal level. "He saved me. I-I shouldn't even be here right now, and I wouldn't be if it wasn't for him. I just, I wish he knew how much I appreciate everything he did for me. He was the best dad I could've asked for."

The conversation died off, and Sam eventually took Jack and Cas back to the bunker, but Alex and Dean stayed until after it was dark. They settled on the ground together, Dean sitting behind Alex with a leg to either side of her hips while she layed on his chest, and for a while they just watched the fire.

"So, you've got some major juice now, huh?" Dean asked as the last flames licked at what remained of a charred log.

Alex tensed. "Gabe was gonna remove it after...I really didn't think I'd have it this long. I guess it's permanent," she murmured. 

Dean rubbed her upper arms lightly as he spoke. "That's not necessarily a bad thing, you know," he said cautiously. 

She sat up and turned to examine his face. "What do you mean?" 

He shrugged. "You were such a badass today, Al. You took on an archangel and won. I'm proud of you."

"You're not mad or anything? I mean, I'm not even human anymore."

He sighed and looked her in the eye. "Look, you were able to take care of yourself against some pretty fierce warriors. I'd say that your safety far outweighs any kind of reservations I could have. Besides, you're still you." Dean smiled and cupped Alex's face. "You've just got superpowers now."

"I was so scared." Her eyes filled with tears, and Dean wiped one away with his thumb. "I thought I'd lost you."

"See, this is the part where anyone else would swear you'd never lose them." Dean frowned and leaned slowly towards Alex. "I'm sorry I hurt you, Al, but I can't make those promises, not in this life. I wish I could tell you that I'll always be here, but I don't get a happy ending. It's just not in the cards for me." 

"What are you saying, Dean?"

His hand fell away from her cheek, and Dean closed his eyes and took a ragged breath before pushing past the pain in his chest. "I'm saying that if you can't live with that kind of uncertainty, I get it, and it's okay. You can go and find someone else, and I'll stay here..." 

Alex just stared at him for a few moments, her eyes wide and lips parted as she struggled to understand what he was saying. Finally, she shook her head and gripped the front of Dean's shirt. "What if I don't want anyone else? What if I want you, regardless of the risks?"

His eyes snapped open. She couldn't be serious, could she? Dean's heart was pounding, and his couldn't breathe. "Then you could stay, and I'd love you with everything I have everyday I got the chance."

"That's good enough for me," she said before jerking him forwards into a kiss. Alex tried to convey her feelings for him through the connection, to make Dean realize that she wanted him, always, and without hesitation. 

Dean went willingly. He needed to know that all of this was real, that he wasn't still stuck in his mind being tortured by Michael. He needed to know Alex was really agreeing to stay, to share a life with him, to wake up everyday and fight side by side against whatever evil plagued the world.

She sighed into his mouth, and it struck a chord deep within his soul. Dean needed her, all of her. He needed her like air, his body pressing against her wherever he could reach, but it wasn't enough. 

"Al," he groaned, forcing himself to pull away and rest his forehead against hers. "It's okay if you don't want to, but damn it, I want to bury myself in you." She bit her lip and placed a hand on either side of his face, holding him there as she looked at him with those big, brown eyes. It was almost enough to do him in right there.

Wrecked. The man appeared absolutely wrecked as he stared at her through half-lidded eyes. His hair was still a mess from the fight and from Alex running her hands through it, and he had a smudge of dirt on his left cheekbone. His pink lips were swollen, and his tongue darted out to wet them before settling between his teeth. His whole body was tense, coiled like a spring with contained desire, just waiting for her word. After everything they'd been through, how could she say no?

She kissed him once, just a short and sweet peck on the lips, before nodding and gently pushing him onto his back as she straddled his hips. 

"Thank God," Dean panted out while she kissed and sucked her way down his jaw and into the crook of his neck. He gripped her waist and worked his hands up under her shirt before slipping it off entirely. The feel of her skin, the smell of her body wash mixed with sweat and smoke, the love in her eyes as she stared up at him while unbuckling his belt and opening his pants...It was all too much and not enough, so Dean quickly shed the remainder of their clothing, too impatient to wait any longer. 

Alex wanted to make Dean feel wanted. She wanted him to feel pleasure when all too often what he felt was pain. She took his cock deep into her mouth, sucking hard while he threaded his hands in her hair, guiding her speed. Pride welled up inside her as he groaned loudly, and Alex looked up to see him staring back at her, biting hard on his bottom lip. She swallowed around him, and Dean's head fell back against the grass.

"Let me hear you, babe," she whispered as she replaced her mouth with her hand. She sucked on his swollen head, licking up his precome as soon as it dribbled out, and twisted her hand around his shaft while her tongue dipped into his slit. Dean growled, and his hips bucked up seeking more. 

Dean finally pulled her up by her shoulders and rolled on top of her before immediately sinking into her. She gasped when he was fully seated and moaned while he pulled out inch by inch until only the tip of his cock was touching her folds. His body wanted to pound into her, but his heart wanted to go slow and drag it out until they'd both forgotten their names. 

Dean brushed her hair away from her face and studied every line, every move, as he sank slowly inside her over and over again. Alex pulled at his skin and moaned his name while he moved, murmuring pleas and words of praise when he hit just the right spot. 

She arched against him, and he met her with a searing kiss, putting every emotion he had behind it, feeling his heart swell as she tightened and then came around him. His hips snapped forward as he lost control and gave in to the physical sensations, pushing into her over and over until he came with a hoarse cry, shooting load after load deep into her.

They clung desperately to each other as their breathing slowed, and Dean didn't realize what he was doing until Alex wiped his face with her fingers, because Dean Winchester did not cry during sex, but maybe, just maybe, he could shed a few tears after making love to the woman who just that morning he never thought he'd see again. 

Alex held him until he stopped shaking, whispering in his ear while she ran her fingertips lightly over his skin. She told him how much she loved him, how much she needed him, and about the absolute terror she lived in from the moment she realized he'd given himself to Michael. 

Dean pulled himself together and kissed her again, committing to memory everything about that moment. If he died tomorrow, he wanted this to be the last thing that he thought of.   
_____________

"What now?" Alex asked as she took a sip of her whiskey. 

She and Dean had stayed outside for a while, staring up at the stars and just enjoying the feel of each other, but eventually Dean grew restless, and she knew he needed to see his mom, so they headed back to the bunker. Mary had broken down into sobs when she saw Dean alive and well, and she apologized profusely for forcing him into that position with Michael while he hugged her tight and denied her every attempt to take the blame for any of it, saying it was his choice and reminding her that he didn't regret it for a second. 

Now they were all gathered around the map table, a bottle of whiskey split between the six glasses that littered the surface. Dean reached for Alex's hand after she spoke, silently offering his support. Sam sighed and ran a hand through his hair while leaning back and laying the other arm lightly across Mary's shoulders. Jack just looked around at the others, waiting for someone else to speak, and Castiel met Dean's eyes before settling his forearms on the table.

"We wait," Castiel said firmly. "We watch the rift until it closes, and we keep an eye out for any others that appear. If anyone or anything else steps through, we assess and fight if necessary. This family has lost enough, and I refuse to let anyone else hurt this world or the ones I love."

"To fighting," Dean said, raising his glass. The others murmured their assent and drained their drinks. Little by little, they retired for the night, until only Alex and Dean remained. 

"You wanna go to bed?" she asked after an eternity of silence. 

Dean sighed and ran a hand down his face. He was exhausted, but he was half scared to go to sleep for fear of reliving his torture. "I don't know if I can," he admitted. 

Alex's face softened, and she pulled him out of the chair. "Gabe showed me something while he was training me and Jack," she explained as she led him to his room. "It was supposed to just be practice, you know, teaching me how to use my grace for little things before we got into the heavy stuff, but now I wonder if he knew what was going to happen. Maybe he was prepping me for a life with it because he wouldn't be around to remove my grace again."

They walked inside and Dean let her remove his clothes before quickly stripping down herself and climbing in bed. "So what's this trick?" he asked.

"Just relax, get comfortable," Alex told him before pressing a gentle kiss to his lips. "I love you, Dean."

He slipped his arms around her and held her close while he stared into her eyes. "I love you, too, Al."

She reached up and pressed two fingers against his forehead, and Dean slept without fear, or anger, or pain. Nightmares didn't plague him anymore, just dreams of peace and happiness and love. 

Alex smiled and sent a prayer of thanks to her dad. He'd given her a gift, and she intended to use it for as much good as possible in their dark world.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the end of the Broken Wings story. I apologize for taking so long to finish this chapter, but honestly I just didn't want it to end. 
> 
> SO, because I love these characters so much, I may end up posting little one shots here and there with these same characters. It'll all be a part of the series, so hopefully it's easy enough to find should you go looking. 
> 
> Thank you, thank you, thank you to my wonderful readers and especially those leaving kudos. I appreciate you sticking with me and giving me the confidence to keep writing. It's become a wonderful hobby and somewhat therapeutic as I put my ideas out there. You're all winners in my book, and I seriously owe you one.
> 
> Thanks again and remember: Always Keep Fighting!


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